Hi GabriellaR45 . I am Lady Elizabeth of House Greyjoy. You are being reviewed as part of "Game of Thrones" .




I enjoyed your poem. The way it is written, does not seem like a "standard" stanza. This is written more like a story. Nice! Of all the poems I have read, I do not normally see them written this way. It is interesting and keeps my attention. I love that your piece is nature-based.



Tone: The tones I get from this piece are awe and intimate. I say intimate, because you are so familiar with the surrounding countryside. I can sense the awe that is felt towards the sounds of nature and the beauty of the countryside.

Mood: When I read this poem, I feel awe as well. I love nature and enjoy spending time out in it. I have a deep appreciation for my natural surroundings. I feel joy because being remotely near any of this, would make me happy - any day.



I could not find a specific form this poem fits, with the exception of one ... Free-form. As I read through this piece, it was pretty easy to read through, with the exception of four lines that kept tripping me up. I will speak on that further in the review. You held my attention through the entire piece. Great job.



I can relate to this poem. I love to be out in nature. Whenever I get in bed, I enjoy listening to the sounds of nature surrounding me. It actually helps me sleep better AND it is comforting to my soul. With your words, I felt as if I were in the countryside with you. I prefer the countryside to the city - any day. I wish I had that kind of scenery here in Arizona. This poem makes me miss living back in Georgia, or being able to travel to North Carolina. Way to go, on having such an impact on me, with this piece.



For the most part, your grammar and punctuation was pretty good. Although, there were things I found, that could use some tweaking.

Stanza 1, Line 2: Owls trumpet ... feathery breast.
Suggestion 1: To make this line read easier, place a comma after darkness.

Stanza 1, Line 3: A pair ... mute precision.
Suggestion 1: swoops should be swoop. bats is a plural noun. If it was bat, then it would be swoops.

Stanza 2, Line 3: The meadow ... nightly showers.
Suggestion 1: Place a comma between ago and sprouts. This will help the sentence read better.

Stanza 2, Line 5: The light of each day tumbles down through us into night.
Suggestion 1: This sentence needs to be re-written. It is confusing and difficult to read. It does not make sense to me.
Try: The light of each day, shines upon us until night falls.



Always proofread your piece. Check for spelling and grammar errors.

Watch out for run-on sentences. If the sentence can be broken down into two separate ones, and still make sense, then go ahead and do it. The line will not lose its meaning.







I look forward to reading more of your work.

Write on!





My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .