\"Writing.Com
*Magnify*
SPONSORED LINKS
BY ONLINE AUTHORS
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4324958
Review #4324958
Viewing a review of:
 One Nice Sunny Day Open in new Window. [18+]
It is more than love
by writergeorge Author Icon
Review by PureSciFi Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 18+ | (3.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Click to go to WDC Power Reviewers


Hello writergeorge,

I saw that this is your anniversary month with WDC. This is your ninth year with us.


Overall Impression: At first it didn't look like this story was going to go into the Gay/Lesbian genre because it was involving a so-called straight couple. But as the story progressed I realized I was wrong. This is a Gay/Lesbian story sort of but at the same time, it isn't. I still think that you did a great job with it, though.

The Story Itself: A couple, Beth and Mark, go to the park to have a picnic. While they are having it they see two males walking through the park holding hands and appearing romantic toward each other. And they comment on that. What Mark doesn't know is that Beth had a lesbian encounter in college. In fact, it read like it was more than just an encounter. I think you did a great job with this story. The only think I would have changed with is was a space between the paragraphs.

Location, Location, Location: The location for this story was a park. I think you did a very good job describing it too.

Your Characters: Of Course, Beth and Mark are the main characters in this story. There were a few others mentioned. But they were only mentioned. I liked that you gave your characters a name. A lot of writers don’t do that. Personally, I try to give all my characters a name. Especially, the main ones. I think that it makes them feel more real if they have a name.

How They Spoke: There wasn't a lot of dialogue in this story. But there was some. And what dialogue there was looked good. At least it did to me.

Grammar, Spelling, Missing Words: I don't think putting a space in between paragraphs is a grammar error or not. But you might want to check into that.

Any Last Thoughts: When I first starting reading this story and it was about a so-called straight couple I thought that it was going to be a gay bashing story. I'm glad that I was wrong.


If you're interested in reviewing any of my work you will find my Short Stories, Blogs, etc. in my PureSciFi Author Icon portfolio. I have some in my PureSciFiPlus Author Icon portfolio too.

Thank you for sharing this story with WDC. And sharing it especially with me. Keep on writing great stories like this one.

                                       PureSciFi aka spacefaction
                                       PureSciFi Author Icon




A new Anniversary Review signature to use, courtesy of [Link To User legerdemain]                               ** Image ID #1795158 Unavailable **



*Gold* My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" Open in new Window..
   *NoteR* You have not yet responded to this review. Ignore
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4324958