Title of Work: : The Hunter and His Prey
Author of Work: : JMariah
Date: : July 6th

Plot:
A very hungry Coyote, suffering from the heat, lack of water and lack of food, kills a rabbit, who has come, to the surface, out of its hole looking for the same thing.

Scene/Setting:
It is the hot desert. There has been no rain for a very long time. A coyote comes out of it's cave and tries to find food. A small rabbit comes out of its hole also looking for food. The rabbit does not see the coyote, which is sneaking up on it. The coyote, pounces and kills the rabbit.

Characters:
coyote
rabbit

Suggestions:
I found this very well written considering the words "flash fiction" gave you to work with. I have only tried that site a couple of time. I enjoyed it, but it was a bit intense for me. I found the use of your descriptive words enjoyable. Each sentence drew me further into the story. I was able to really feel what was happening in the scene. I could picture the dry earth and how, the sun, would wipe away any evidence the rabbit had even existed in the area.

It would not be hard to imagine this snippet as the beginning of a larger story. Maybe someone is lost in the desert and you are introducing the setting. The picture of a dying man walking by and seeing what is happening keeps popping in my head. If that idea works for you, feel free to use it.

I look forward to reading more of your work.


Character Count: 1,230 (tags = 222 Characters)
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