Review number # 6 of week

Hi J. Thayne

My name is Lyn and I am doing a review for Simply Positive.

Please remember I am a writer, I know what it feels like to be reviewed! Please take what you feel is helpful and disregard the rest. Only YOU know what is right for your writing!

Title: Carry Me

First Impression: Thank you for addressing a difficult and often avoided topic. People tend to see the whole soldiers and simply forget the risks each face in duty.

What I liked: I enjoyed it from Elly's point of view, the anger and raw pain came alive on the page as I read. Most stories you read are about male soldier's so this was refreshing to me. Her frustration with the system, and her injury spoke volumes about her character. She's my kind of character!

What needs your attention: Reading on a computer is challenging and when the spacing is so close it makes reading difficult. It would be easier if you changed the spacing for the readers ease.
I did not find any punctuation or grammar errors that distracted the reader.

Favorite Parts: G I Joe and Elly explaining her injury to the young boy, that was very well done. In the real world, parents tend to quickly draw their children back making the situation even more painful and awkward. I thought you allowing the child's curiosity to unfold was perfect.

Overall Impression: A thought provoking and at times heart wrenching read but well worth the time. Congrats on your Quill nomination.

Thank you for letting me read your work. It was my pleasure!
Lyn




My review has been submitted for consideration in "Good Deeds Get CASH!" .