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Review #4194550
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Review by Shaye Author IconMail Icon
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Rated: | (5.0)
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Hi Elle - on hiatus Author Icon,

I am Lorraine and I am reviewing your piece "Invalid Item" Open in new Window. today in affiliation with "Simply Positive Review Forum " Open in new Window..

*Flowerw* This is a review from "WdC Kind Hearts" Open in new Window. *Flowerw*


Title: The prompt was an email lost in cyberspace, so an inbox reading "No New Mail" is the perfect image to give, just as the title alone.

First Impression: I thoroughly enjoyed this piece! I could honestly picture the little email, like an envelope with short arms and legs and goggly eyes running along corridor after corridor, trying multiple doors. It's a cute image.

Plot: The email is lost come the start, and tension builds as the time passes and the email is later and later, luckily it finds it's destination at the end.

Characterisation: Is it possible to characterise an email? Yes! I described how I imagined the frantic email, but I also imagine a larger email, with an angry expression for the email that bellowed at your main character email. Loved it!

Setting: You describe numerous characters and doors, each room different looking and unique to the owner. Your description helps portray the confusion of the reader, and the short sentences create a faster reading speed, demonstrating the emails need to hurry.

Spelling/Grammar: No errors spotted.

Closing Thoughts: Loved it. There's not much else I can say. Your brief description of your "short stories" folder say short stories aren't your forte, but considering that, you seem to be very good at them!

Lorraine

Reviewed as part of "Invalid Item" Open in new Window.
** Image ID #1934576 Unavailable **

Listen, smile, agree, and then do whatever you were going to do anyway! Robert Downey Jr.


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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 02/07/2016 @ 9:18pm EST
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/4194550