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![]() | Wedding ![]() Submission to Flash Fiction ![]() |
Greetings Hiroshi Jones ![]() ![]() Purpose: Hiroshi, once again Welcome to Writing.Com!!! We are so pleased you have joined our warm and creative community of authors. Also, please feel free to ask questions as this site offers a great deal but can be a little overwhelming at first. I really enjoy the pace of flash fiction, in that the writing has to be more precise if the intent of the writer is to be clearly conveyed to his or her readers. Plot: This tale is about a girl Tonya, who basically grows up in a single head of household and doesn't even meet her dad till age ten. In this fast paced story, we find an encounter with her dad at age sixteen that lasts a few years until he leaves about as quickly as he came. Rapidly your reader gets to fill-in-the-blanks of this relationally complex, painful and heart wrenching relationship. And really with what might seem against the psychological odds, Tonya becomes engaged at age thirty; and is required to cope with her father inserting himself in her wedding plans. He is emotional and therefore unreasonable in his demand to walk her down the aisle; not wanting to be outdone by the stepdad who actually raised Tonya from age six. Through more painful discourse Tonya tells her birth father he is no longer welcome at her wedding; only to receive a phone call with him crying and pleading to at least be allowed as a guest. She acquiesces, and then all the background noise crescendos with the sounds of a fatal crash. Overall/Suggestions: You really did a nice job of fitting a big story into a little space. I just have a few suggestions for your consideration. ![]() ![]() Favorite Line: ![]() Closing Thought: ![]() ![]() ![]() Again, Welcome to Writing.Com!!! Regards, ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** Proud Member Of: The Paper Doll Gang Jr. Lead Showering Acts of Joy Art of Criticism Muse Masters WDC Power Reviewers ![]() ![]()
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