I am reviewing your work as a judge for "CLASH! " [13+]. The following are all my opinions for you to heed or discard as you please.
Character:
What I like: The character sketch is informative and to the point. I prefer them like this so I can take only the basic information and learn the rest of the character in the story.
What I'd like to see improved upon: I was unsure of the point of the religious background. It made me expect some allegory or spiritual conflict in the story.
Story:
What I like: I like the dynamic of the brother vs brother conflict.
What I'd like to see improved upon:It's pretty solid as is. The only thing I found off-putting was the way the computer went from robotic to humanly conversational.
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