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Review #3921392
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Review by ♫~ Kenword~♫ Author IconMail Icon
Rated: | (4.0)
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I selected your story to review through the “Random Review Forum” of WdC.
Having benefited from your kind reviews I was glad your story “The Bad Girl” came up. I was delighted to read your story and I am happy that I have an opportunity to give back some of your encouragement.

 
My review is based solely on my opinion and feelings. While I may suggest some structural alterations, I prefer to lend my feelings and impressions about a story in the hopes that they may be of some help and encourage further thought about what has been created. Please take what you think is appropriate for your work and disregard the rest.
 
Overall Impression
 
What would life be without the Katlyn’s of the world? Drab, barren, boring. Fewer heartbreak songs would have been written and country music for 80 years would have had a giant void. But I love her. My own regrets in life are wrapped up in a beautiful Katlyn, full of secrets and plots, but fire and passion that consumed nearly an entire year. She can’t have her husband, but she can fill the lonely times with any man she wants. For Ray, Katlyn is someone to indulge and play with, but only until the “Bad Girl” comes to her senses.
 
Interest and Pace
 
Katlyn, Ray and Fred are all nicely developed characters. It is easy for me to enter into the triangle of love and infidelity. Through their lives you answer some of the questions and lingering doubts I had in my own broken relationships. You set up Katlyn’s dilemma with the morality she is expected to live by and the desperate loneliness that no amount of gifts from her husband can eliminate. Fred and Katlyn in the bedroom is classic: ”O, Fred, What a pleasant surprise!” She was relieved because Ray escaped through the window.”How is it that the “scarlet woman” can lie straight into the face of her significant other? You have captured well the reasons and the skills associated with the adulterous heart. Scathing.
 
Structure and Clarity
 
The plot is well formulated and the writing is clear and entertaining. You give some insights to Katlyn that I are sincerely true, but almost hysterical at the same time ”Kat couldn’t understand why her friends weren’t being supportive of her deeds.” Like, what’s wrong with her friends anyway? I love what these thoughts reveal about Katlyn.
 
Edits/Revisions
 
There were a few grammatical issues that need to be cleared up if you decide to revisit your story. Other than that I believe the story is well constructed, with great dialogue and memorable images.
 
Summary
 
Katlyn lives in a mansion and is married to a man who gives her wonderful, expensive gifts. Not only does he give them occasionally, he tries to outdo himself every time he brings her something. She has a driver for her car, lovely friends and a life that is most enviable in every way. But Kat suffers from the age old dilemma of what does one do when they are lonely. The test of character is truly in what one chooses to fill up the empty hours. Kat is in the crucible of that test and waking up to the reality that she could lose it all.
 
Your story was really well done, hitting home to where I still have some raw memories. I enjoyed it on every level.
 
Thank you.
 
~Kenword~
*MugR*
 
 
 
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