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Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3825436
Review #3825436
Viewing a review of:
 Dining and Dashing Open in new Window. [13+]
Sr. Mod 10th Birthday Contest - 9/5/10 - Memorable dining experience.
by Jeff Author Icon
Review by Noyoki Author IconMail Icon
In affiliation with WdC SuperPower Reviewers Group  Open in new Window.
Rated: 13+ | (4.5)
Access:  Public | Hide Review (?)
Hello Jeff Author Icon,

My Thoughts:

This was a fun story, where we were able to fall easily into the lives of these two friends. You were able to give us a lot of good back story without doing any information dumps, and we got a clear view of all the characters.

My Favorite Part:

My favorite part was how the memory made me feel. It was like being a little kid again after my mother finished baking cookies, my friend and I would steal one and run down the hall to hide around the corner, all the while giggling at our small crime.

My Suggestions:

Quick edit: 'who came out and screamed at their in Italian. Their should be them.

Thank you,

~Noyoki

Write On!!


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   *CheckG* You responded to this review 02/15/2013 @ 3:03pm EST
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3825436