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 Review #3796477 |
 FIRST IMPRESSIONA well told erotic tale of two lovers celebrating the holiday together with a little naughty fun thrown in.  MY THOUGHTSI enjoyed the story you have written and the look into the character's lives you have given your readers. I could clearly see the reactions that Thomas had to the decorations that Kyle had put up for them. While I did enjoy the story you have written I must say that I found a few areas that I believe could use some clarification, and or improvement. I have listed those places in the suggestion area because I felt that in some places there was a word or two missing.  FAVORITE PARTUnable to help himself, Kyle slipped over near the tree, bending down to run a hand up Thomas's jeans near his thigh. "Is this my Christmas present? Because if so, I can't wait to unwrap it." I chose the above because I thought it was cute and funny, something I would totally do.  ERRORSI found none that I could list here.  SUGGESTIONSKyle took out the white and silver key, spending a moment standing in front of the door, bags in his left hand Even after all these years he still found time each day before entering the home he shared with Thomas to appreciate the gift of the second chance he'd been given. his legs sticking out as he focused placed his hand under Kyle's chin for a moment before being pulled to direct his gaze up. Write On!  
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You responded to this review 12/15/2012 @ 1:44am EST