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Review #3774575
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Rated: | (4.5)
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I was just browsing your port and thought I would send you a quick review for this piece.

This is a very good piece. There is some wonderful imagery here. I love the serene mood combined with that slightly eerie edge that matches the plot perfectly. I think you have done a really good job here. The description is wonderfully detailed without being too much and your dialogue feels natural. It is a nicely polished piece and flows well, throughout.

To be very picky, I feel the grandfather character could be made stronger. It is mentioned he has poor vision. I feel that could be communicated more through his actions and mannerisms. Other than that I found this a really strongly written piece.

Very good job. Keep it up.
   *CheckG* You responded to this review 10/15/2012 @ 10:16am EDT
Printed from https://writing.com/main/my_feedback/action/view/id/3774575