Since you have little interest in becoming a human balloon, you decide to take the red pills. "As wise a choice as any," says the crone. "I hope you're truly ready to kiss that slender frame goodbye, because that is what you'll be doing."
"But can't I work out to lose the weight?" you ask.
"You'll have to work out twice as harder. On top of this, you're appetite will increase threefold and your predilection toward laziness will grow. You might as well consider the weight you gain from the red pills as weight you will carry until you die."
Heavy stuff. Are you ready to make such a commitment?
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