Pressing the possession button, Ritsuka prepared himself before speaking out the name of Parvati!
As soon as he pressed the button and spoke the goddess' name, Ritsuka saw how the world around him shifted in an instant, he noticed he was in a different part of Chaldea, and the purple locks of hair he now had were a good clue the device had worked.
One look down confirmed he was now possessing the body of the goddess, who at the same was possessing the body of a Japanese girl. For a moment he wondered who exactly he was possessing at the moment, a random girl, or an Indian goddess? But his mind did not dwindle on the true nature of Pseudo-Servants for long, he had a mission to do! These types of questions could wait!
"I need to find a bachelor for Parvati! I know she has a husband but since I've never summoned him, he might as well not exist!" Ritsuka exclaimed as he started exploring the halls of Chaldea. He had no idea what was Parvati's type of men, but maybe he could guess if he thought about her absent husband.
Shiva, another Indian deity he knew nothing about, after spending so much time with deities, and even going through an Indian Lostbelt, one would expect him to be an expert in that type of mythology. But alas, he was no expert, the only thing he knew about Parvati's missing other half was that he was the god of time, construction, and destruction.
Two of those three items made his head spin, he wasn't sure what type of men fit that type of description, but destruction was far easier, evil servants! "So I suppose opposites attract" Ritsuka mumbled, seeing the sweet and motherly Parvati hooking up with an evil-doer would be quite shocking, but if that was her type there was very little he could do.
He started thinking about which evil servant would be interested in an Indian goddess, but he didn't have to think about that for too long, because he soon bumped into the answer, literally, on his way to the cafeteria he bumped into The Napoleon of Crime, James Moriarty!
But if the scowl on his face was anything to go by, the criminal did not seem happy to see Parvati. "Look where you're going!"
"I'm sorry, I got lost..." Ritsuka started to think of a pick-up line, after all, he had seen this type of situation play many times in the doujins he borrowed from Blackbeard, the difference was that it was the guy who tried to flirt, but still, he would try his best. "I got lost in your eyes!"
"Excuse me?" The only thing he achieved with that line was to make Moriarty arch an eyebrow.
"Oh y-you know, it's Valentine's Day!" Ritsuka replied, starting to get nervous, that one never failed in the doujins! "And we're both alone, and I was thinking maybe–"
The evil mastermind cut him off with a chuckle and showed his open palm. "Stop right there, little misses, I know where you're going and I'm not interested in someone like you, a self-righteous woman that despises evil, so why don't you go do something tailored to your character, like playing with orphans, or pat a puppy, or something as revoltingly good as those actions!"
"Huh..." Ritsuka did not expect such a reaction, the line he had used always worked on those doujins! The only possible explanation he could think of was that Moriarty was only interested in evildoers like himself, "Don't say that! I'm extremely evil!"
"Oh don't make me laugh, my dear, you don't have an ounce of malice in your body! Now why don't you go bother someone else?" The mastermind shook his head and then started walking away.
"W-wait!" he said, placing a hand on Moriarty's shoulder. 'Evil, evil, evil! I need to do something evil now!' Ritsuka thought as he looked at his surroundings, it wasn't too long for him to find a target for his evil deed.
Jack and Rhyme were sitting nearby, eating from a heart-shaped chocolate box that someone had left behind. "I'll show you just how malicious I can be! Look!" Ritsuka said as he walked up to the young servants.
"H-hello, children! Are you... enjoying Valentine's Day?" He said as he approached the table, hoping Parvati's usual motherly image was enough to get the kids to lower their guards.
He soon got a reply in the shape of Jack trying to stab him, fortunately, he was used to the Assassin servant's tendencies to try to... assassinate him, so he was ready to dodge out of the way and take the knife off the girl's hands. He would have thought she was mad at him if it weren't for the smile resting on her face.
"I'll take that as a yes..." Ritsuka forced himself to chuckle as he kept the bladed weapon away from Jack. Then he turned his attention to Rhyme. "It seems like you two really like chocolate, don't you?" His question was answered by both girls vigorously nodding their heads, allowing him to appreciate the chocolate stains they had on their cheeks.
'They really like it... I almost feel bad for what I'm about to do...' the Master thought as he sat between the children, crouching next to them so they could clearly hear what he was about to say. "Awww, that's adorable, would you like it if I get you more?" The kids' faces lit up after hearing his offer, which prompted him to put his plan into action.
"Hehehe" Ritsuka let out the most evil-sounding laughter he could do, which in all honesty sounded more like he was choking or coughing, but he didn't seem to notice. "Well, too bad!" He yelled as he picked up the heart-shaped box. "Valentine's chocolate is only for couples! Not dumb kids, like you two!"
Another cruel action followed his proclamation, Ritsuka proceeded to pull from Rhyme's braids and shoved her against her friend, sending both of them to the ground. With his mission achieved Ritsuka left the cafeteria, cackling as if he were an evil witch... or at least that's what he thought he sounded like, to any passerby 'Parvati' just seemed to be having a nasty coughing fit.
"Here you go, my beloved evil professor!" Ritsuka smiled as he handed the chocolate box to Moriarty. "Stealing is already a pretty evil act, but stealing from children? That's downright reprehensible!" he exclaimed as his smile turned into a smirk, now Moriarty had no choice but to fall head over heels for Parvati!
But his cocky demeanor quickly vanished when nothing but silence followed his word. Looking at Moriarty, he could see the evil mastermind rubbing his index finger against his temple as if he were a disappointed father about to explain something to his disappointing child.
"I don't even know where to begin, that was pathetic! Don't you know that stealing candy from a baby is supposed to be an idiom!" the professor yelled. "And where's the fun in stealing from kids? Where's the fun in gloating about your evil deeds in front of someone whose only concern is to ruin their teeth, and play all day?"
"Well... eating chocolate is their whole world! I r-ruined their day! They'll be devastated for–" Ritsuka tried to argue but was cut off.
"For a few minutes until some do-gooder buys them more cocoa-based bars, they're just dumb children! The only evil thing about your little act was your coughing, if you made those two catch something, maybe that would have been evil!
"Coughing?" Chaldea's master couldn't help but arch an eyebrow, when did he cough?
"Forget it, I can see you're just trying to act evil! Stop this nonsensical act, and stop bothering me!" Moriarty shouted as he stormed off.
As Ritsuka saw the evil mastermind walking away, he wondered if maybe he wasn't a good match for Parvati. Maybe he should focus on a different servant, or maybe he should possess an entirely different servant. On the other hand, he didn't give up easily, but to get Moriarty's attention he would have to do something even more evil than stealing candies from children, could he really do something so despicable only to get someone a date?
In the end, Ritsuka decided to...
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