"Really now, is this entirely necessary?" Naoto Shirogane asked in mild exasperation.
"Well, you did catch her, after all." Inspector Adachi said, offering the Detective Prince (a nickname applied to the young detective long ago, obviously by admirers who had not realized her true gender) a large, buffoonish smile.
"Sigh. All I did was point out certain facts in the case that led to her arrest. Really, it was your own report that clinched the matter...I just pointed out a few details your superiors missed." Naoto said.
"Hey, don't downplay your part! You did what any good police consultant would do...uhh...you consulted! Besides, she was originally called in for questioning on the serial murders case. So I'd like to downplay my involvement as much as possible. Dojima-san gives me enough bad looks as it is these days...." Adachi said sheepishly.
Naoto shook her head in exasperation. While it was true that the latest suspect was indeed a criminal, apprehending a local pick pocket and panty thief was a far cry from locating the mysterious serial murderer that had haunted the town for so long. That Adachi had zeroed in on this girl, Izumi Caito, as suspicious was sadly no real surprise. Adachi had picked up on her suspicious behavior and once again let his enthusiasm override his common sense. While the girl had been guilty of something, one look at her should have told the detective that she had neither the resources nor the upper body strength to efficiently kidnap and carry a grown adult any distance (both prerequisites for the serial killer/kidnapper to have). Naoto considered the whole episode yet another waste of her time (ironic, since she had recently been called off the case...but her dealings with the Investigation Team had opened up new avenues to the mystery the police themselves could never ever comprehend!), and that her deductions managed to book the suspect on entirely separate crimes was small consolation. Adachi was an expert at wasting time, so much so that Naoto suspected his "aid" had helped the actual killer steal away his victims more than it had helped the investigation. Purely coincidentally, of course.
"Come on, Naoto-san! Anyone else would have completely missed this suspect. She's a tricky one! Just ask a few questions, see if that amazing intuition of yours gets to tingling! It'll give you some work while your out here going to school, and it'll help the department out a lot! Please?" Adachi begged.
Naoto sighed. In truth the less she had to work with the department the more she could focus on the murder case under the table, but there was no graceful way to refuse this particular request. The police reasonably believed she was desperate to get back in their good graces and hungry for any scrap of work they might toss her, and there was something to be said for playing up that facade a bit. Still, interviewing a pervert was hardly worthy of her talents, even a tricky one.
And so the detective prince found herself in a dimly lit room seated opposite a tanned woman with wild black hair and a playful glint in her eyes.
"Well, well. A visit from the detective prince! I'm honored!" Izumi said with smile.
"Your sarcasm is noted." Naoto said dryly.
"Not at all. I knew if anyone in this town could catch me, it would be you." Izumi smiled. "You are my only match, after all."
"A oridinary, run of the mill, petty crook with a fetish for underwear thinks she's my equal. How flattering." Naoto muttered.
"Okay, now your starting to disappointment me. Ordinary? Really? I'm the best there is, hon! You'd be amazed what I can do with these hands! As for my fetish, what about it? I like to take a peep every now and again, and sometimes I bring back a trophy. When you get to be as good as I am, you deserve to take what you want! I mean, who gets hurt at the end of the day, really? Oh no! Some girl has to suffer through a little embarrassment cause I snatched her panties! Feh. Not like I'm tossing girls up on antennas like you cop buddies thought I had." Izumi said.
"So you believe your crimes are justified on the grounds that they aren't murder?" Naoto said, sighing in exasperation and sipping her coffee.
"I believe any crime is justified when it won't do any real harm. I take chump change from schmucks that don't even know I was there. Sometimes it becomes clear that I've taken more than the oblivious fools can handle...and so I put it back. No one has ever noticed until now. See, it isn't what I take that thrills me, Princey. Its that I can take it, and no one will know I was there. Like a detective, really. You love digging into peoples secrets and pulling out the truth. Am I right? You'd never actually use those secrets to hurt anyone (except the criminals, of course). The thrill comes from being able to yank those secrets out and discover what your subjects were hiding! Same thing."
"Except I don't get off on exposing those secrets. You receive a sexual thrill from stealing undergarments and other personal items!"
"Well, that just makes you the bigger prude between the two of us, doesn't it?" Izumi said smiling.
"Enough. I'm wasting my time here..." Naoto muttered.
"At first I was thinking the same thing. It was kinda easy to do this even with you right in front of me. But no. It looks like you've got some particularly juicy secrets to hide..." Izumi said with a smile, raising her hands from under the table to reveal a blue thong between her fingers.
Naoto stared a moment. She realized dumbly that the suspect had gotten out of her handcuffs. And then it dawned on Naoto how familiar that thong looked. Looking around, Naoto carefully felt around her waste, looking for the tell tail feel of the fabric beneath her blue pants lining. Her complexion reddened significantly.
"Soooo...what is this? A cross dressing fetish? Naw. Your too serious for that. Are you just pretending? Maybe trying to milk your androgyny long enough to get a reputation you can ride on even when your curves really come in and you can't hide it anymore? Hmmm...I think that's part of it, but it isn't everything, right? So...are you just a little girl who wants to be more like those big burly hard boiled detectives in the old black and white movies...or is this a full blown 'guy in a girl's body' transgender things? Which, by the by, is totally cool with me. Be whoever you need to be, ya know? Just curious."
Naoto glared at her. "How....?"
"Nah nah nah. No answering a question with a question, Miss Detective Prince...ess. But maybe its too early to know that one, huh? Your still pretty young. Getting to know your sexuality can take awhile, am I right? So forget I asked. You'll figure it out sooner or later, I'm sure."
"Listen here....!" Naoto began, then yelped in surprise. Her left arm was handcuffed to the table!
"Nope. You listen. Your a damn clever little cutey pie, Naoto-'hon', but your also arrogant. You were so self-assured just now that picking your pocket was as easy as any dope on the street. I've been following you awhile, Nao-chan. I knew you were a match for me. But in person you totally underestimated me. Kinda pisses me off, you know? Holmes wouldn't of lastest five minutes if he stuck his nose up at Moriarty that way. I think I need to teach you a little lesson..."
"How did you get my underwear. That...that isn't physically possible!"
"Heh. Impossible is a word for people who aren't masters of their craft, Naoto. I can steal anything, anytime, off anyone. Now then...enough chitchat. Your going to help me get out of here, Naoto-chan. Completely unseen."
"After revealing how dangerous you really are? What could possibly convince me to do that?"
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