Chapter #3Your Best Friend by: Unknown Your didn't choose your first test subject so much as she chose you. You hear a rhythmic series of knocks against your front door, followed by the singsong voice of your best friend, Elle. "I keep a' knockin', so can I come in? I keep a' knockin', so can I come in? Woooo!"
There had always been rumors floating around the school that you and Elle were secretly an on-again off-again couple, given the amount of time you spent alone together and the amount of pushing, shoving, and general handsyness the two of you displayed, but truth be told you'd always just been close friends. Your time alone was spent on non-euphemistic hikes through the woods and completely platonic trips to the secluded lake a few miles south. After a while, the two of you got tired of defending your non-sexual friendship and just started playing into it, making up outlandish stories about your imaginary relationship whenever people asked and dropping constant sarcastic references and innuendos alluding to your rocky courtship. After annoying the hell out of everyone with your joint sarcasm most of them finally got the memo that there really was nothing romantic between you to, or at least got tired of asking, though there were still those that thought thou doth protest too much.
While you had no idea why you completely trusted the strange note of the mysterious sword that you found in the woods, you did. As such, you quickly scanned the room for something you could use to demonstrate its power to Elle. You grabbed the first thing that looked remotely interesting, a lava lamp sitting on your desk. Running down the stairs, you decided that things would only be getting stranger from here on out, so there wasn't much point in trying to ease Elle into things. With the sword in one hand, a lava lamp in the other, and Wsxol's note gripped between your teeth, you flung open the door to greet Elle.
Elle took in the sight before her, and when she was sure she didn't know what the hell was going on, asked "Am I missing some context here?"
Like a proud dog returning a ball to its master, you dropped your jaw and allowed the note to flutter out from between your teeth. While Elle was still beyond confused, she did grab the note out of the air and read it. "So, this sword is magic? And you want to replace one of our body parts with a lava lamp to... what exactly are you expecting it to do?"
"No idea, if I'm honest. When I heard you knocking, I just grabbed the first interesting thing I could find." You said.
"Of course you did." She said, ruffling your hair playfully. "Whatever, I'm game."
"So you believe this sword is really magic?" You ask, surprised at just how easy this was.
"Do you not?" Elle asked, confused.
"Of course I do! I just thought it would take a lot more convincing. It is pretty far fetched, wouldn't you agree?" You said, not sure why exactly you were trying to un-convince her but feeling like this was way too easy to be true.
"Yeah, but... I dunno, that note just feels really... convincing? Like as soon as I read it, I just thought 'yup, that sounds about right' without any of the doubts that I normally would and know I should have. I think the note is magic, like a subtle mind control thing." She hypothesized.
"I think you're right, I also didn't doubt the note for a second, even if I know it's totally crazy." You said, nodding. "Anyway, care to come in? Or are we doing this thing on the porch?"
In your usual routine, Elle silently shouldered her way past you as you refused to move out of the doorway unless she asked nicely and she refused to ask you to please move. Closing the door behind her, you turned to see Elle had made herself comfortable in your living room, sprawling over one of the oversized armchairs sideways with her head dangling over one armrest and her legs dangling over the other. You would have asked if she wouldn't mind being the first test subject rather than yourself, then you would've asked what part she'd like replaced, then if she was absolutely sure she trusted the note as much as you did, but looking at her upside down face smiling at you with anticipation, her long and slender neck hanging over the armrest, you knew that as usual you and Elle were on the exact same page and she was answering all of your questions without you even having to ask them.
Setting the lava lamp down on the coffee table and wrapping her long hazel ponytail tightly around your hand, you lifted her head slightly and raised the surprisingly light blade above your head. "Wouldn't this be a really awkward way to find out that we're both just stupidly gullible and this is regular sword?" She asked, looking up at the blade without a hint of concern.
"Would you prefer to be in prison, or dead? Because I'm happy to switch places with you." You offered.
"You know I have a strict 'fuck orange' dress code. Enjoy the view from your cell." She said, adjusting herself in her seat to make herself more comfortable.
While you also thought orange was tacky as hell, you swung the sword anyway. Luckily for both of you, your shared faith in the sword and accompanying note proved well founded, as Elle's head came away from her body with a biologically impossible yelp and a smooth patch of skin on her shoulders where there ought to be an oozing stump. Elle opened her eyes, wincing a little as her head swayed from her scalp, and laughed at the sight of her own headless body turning in its seat and sitting properly in the chair, feeling its stump with tentative but excited fingers.
"Holy shit!" She said, succinctly summing up your own feelings as well.
Setting the sword down on the coffee table and picking up the lava lamp, you proceeded on to step two. Pressing the lava lamp against Elle's shoulders, the head still held in your grip...   indicates the next chapter needs to be written. |
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