Chapter #2More Facts = Less Happiness by: G-Writer   You open your mouth to protest once again about not being a Vexie, but Rachel just chuckles and puts a greasy finger to your mouth (or more accurately, over your entire face) to quiet you. “I get it V, you’re just a teeny tiny human who happens to REALLY like my sweaty feet. Well I can’t have my new little “human” getting sick on me, so lets see what else there is to read here…”
You scream internally as Rachel begins to read silently to herself, apparently the only thing worse than knowing she’s reading more of these “facts” is not knowing what facts she’s reading!
‘Fact 12: Even though they’ll never admit it, Vexies love spending time doing disgusting things with or even for humans! They love helping with icky chores!
‘Fact 13: If a Vexie won’t do something or is being naughty because he’s acting human… You can trick them! Tell them if they do it or behave, you won’t bury them in dog poo! That way, you can be happy because your Vexie did what you wanted, and your Vexie can be happy because he can do the icky stuff without having to admit he’s not human (‘cause humans don’t like dog poo on them either)!
‘Fact 14: The only thing that a Vexie likes almost as much as gross human stuff is hearing gross human secrets about you! He won’t tell anyone else, so make sure you tell him every gross thing you can think of!’
“Oh wow, you ARE gonna make an amazing pet, V! I just came up with the perfect way for you and me to bond! You’ll get to do a nasty chore I’m always putting off, and you’ll get to learn something about me!”
You glare at the behemoth in front of you as she finally moves her finger off your face, immediately defiant. “I’m not doing ANY chores for you, nasty or otherwise! I’m a human, you can’t make m—“
“Now, now, V… No need to be all feisty… How about this, as long as you do what I say and behave, I won’t have to bury you in dog poo! It says here even you wouldn’t like that.”
You can only stare in disbelief. NO ONE would like that! You are about to yell at Rachel again, but have second thoughts. There was no reasoning with this woman, so your only hope is to try and survive while staying on her good side until you can escape… You certainly won’t be able to get help buried under a pile of dog poo, and you have no doubts that Rachel would go through with the threat, so… Dejectedly, you nod your head in defeat. “Fine… I’ll behave…”
Rachel lets out a fit of laughter, raining small droplets of spittle on you as she does, apparently very proud of herself. Oh my gosh, that worked just like the fact journal said! That was so easy, I mean I don’t even have a dog! You sit dejectedly in her hand as she gets up and walks to what you think must be her bedroom, the place decidedly smelling very… Rachel. You’ve come to terms that you won’t be able to get away until after this chore most likely when Rachel suddenly speaks up again.
“Alright, so here’s the deal. I hate having to do laundry because I hate having to sort the dirty clothes into lights and darks, so… You’re going to do it for me! So first, what to start with…?”
Choices:
1. “Well we know you like my feet, so separate the socks that still kinda look white from the really dirty ones!” (She shares a “secret” about her feet.)
2. “Well it all needs to get done, so let’s just get you started!” (The secret is she hasn’t done a load of laundry since her youngest left, and she proceeds to bury you in her dirty clothes.)
3. “Since you promised to be good, I’ll let you sort my undies! (Very dirty secret.)
4. "Then again... Maybe you'd like to lick my slippers clean instead?"
5. "Wait... I just remembered the toilet hasn't been cleaned in ages... If you're lucky it might even be clogged!"
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