Scooping both of them up in his hand, he squeezes tight. Then, pointing at them alternatively with his other finger, he says a rhyme, "Eenie, Meenie, Midee, Madee! Looks like I'll be eating... DADDY!" His finger pointed at his dad. The boy giggled as he dropped his mom to the ground, accidentally breaking her ankle.
From the ground his mother screamed and begged for him to stop. He felt annoyed so he tromped away, down to the end of the street where there was an empty field where he could eat his breakfast in peace. Finally there, he sat down, cross-legged with and 'oomph' and said, "Now, where were we?" His growling stomach answered his question. "That's right! Time to eat you for breakfast, Dad!" Seeing the look of terror in his father's apoplectic face, he said, "Don't worry - if you taste yucky, I'll spit you out... if not, well, you'll just become my burps and farts! Haha!"
The boy grinned as he pulled his trembling father up to his lips, inhaling through his nose. "MMMhhhh, Dad, you smell delicious!...." He paused for a second and with comical effort burped right in his father's face. "But if I eat ya, you won't smell so yummy after a while!" He giggled as his father turned a shade of pink.
Finally finding his voice, the dad trembled, "Please, son... no.. don't!"
"But we always have burping contests, Daddy! You call me the gas champ!" The boy scrunched his face and then a loud reverberating boom echoes from under his crossed legs. He giggled, but was soon annoyed that his dad didn't share in on his impressive feat. "Oh come on! That's the biggest fart, ever! I bet you'll give me a lot of gas, don'cha think?"
"No! Son, that's disgus-"
The boy cut his father off with a well-timed squeeze, eliciting only a wince from his terrified father. Then he licked his lips, and sticking his tongue out, raked his father's face over it like a human lollipop. Then, pondering, the boy waved his blonde hair out of his green eyes and whispered. "Well, Dad, I've got some good news and some bad news. The good news is that you're gonna help me out by being breakfast today...."
"No, son! That's bad -"
"Hey! Let me finish! The BAD news is that by breakfast time tomorrow morning, you're gonna be a record sized poop!" The boy burst into a fit of giggles - apparently this wasn't bad news to him. "Oh come on - you always got a kick out of my unflushable monster logs before, Dad!"
"I was never going to BE- oof"
The boy gave his dad another playful squeeze. "Anyway, you can hear my stomach. I'm hungry - you're breakfast. Let's get started!"
Without further ado, the kid tossed his helpless dad into his slobbering cavern of a mouth, tossed him around on his tongue for a couple of seconds to get him good and slobbery and then unceremoniously swallowed him whole.
After a few seconds, feeling his dad slip into place with a satisfying 'sploot' the boy patted his tummy and let out an earth-shattering belch his mom could hear two blocks away. "Hmm, Dad... you...
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