As Rutabaga and Slippery walked down the streets, they passed plenty of City Guards.
"What's the matter?" one asked. "Did they lose a blade in a body?"
"If they did, it would be in our Lost and Found department," Rutabaga said, barely holding back a smile.
"Do I see some dark happenings going on?" another asked.
"Yes, and things will get very dark indeed for some." said Rutabaga.
"What trouble is this Assassin in that they need you with them?" a third asked.
"That would be with me."
The guard laughed at this.
"I've noticed that none of them have called you Commander, Baron Copperfindersson," said Slippery.
"Call me Rutabaga," said Rutabaga. "And drop the title and rank; I dislike them."
"It would be rude to be informal," said Slippery.
"Formal don't mean a thing when he chains you to the bed and is doing you doggy-style!" called out another guard.
Slippery chuckled nervously at this. "Do you really do that?"
Rutabaga grinned. "Would you like me to do you like that?"
"Um, no; the regular way will be fine," said Slippery. "No chains either."
"Good," said Rutabaga. "Chains make too much noise for my taste." Just then, his nose caught something, along with his ears. "Get down!" Pulling Slippery with him, Rutabaga glimpsed the crossbow bolt zip over them, and impale the guard that had just called out to them. "Slim! Are you alright?"
"Ugh! Just great! The bastard hit me right where it's going to show."
"Where?"
"My heart of course!" yelled Slim. "It would have been yours if you hadn't ducked."
Slippery looked at Rutabaga. "Let me guess; zombie?"
"Do you have a problem with that?" Slim yelled out. "Geesh! I have to pay for the patching on this thing too."
"Slim, mind walking over here?"
The guard came over.
"Turn around."
The guard turned, and Rutabaga got a good look at the bolt.
"A silver head," said Rutabaga. "That would have done the job, aside from piercing right through. This was meant for me."
"Um, do I get hazard pay for this?" Slim asked.
"No, but you can help me catch this guy," said Rutabaga.
"You'll have to get him before I do," said Slippery. "The Guild has an Automatic Contract on anyone that isn't an Assassin that tries to kill you, or doesn't hire an Assassin to kill you."
"Head Assassin respects me that much to protect me from Non-Assassin killers?" Rutabaga asked.
"No, but his wife does."
"Ah, she's the one that served me that frog soup with those rainbow-colored frogs; had a very interesting taste, which put a zip in it," said Rutabaga. "Ask her for some more of that stuff; I'm having a hard time finding the frogs she used, just leave out the Wolfbane - that gives me the runs, and I have a number of meetings to attend."
"I'll mention that to her," said Slippery. "You're the only person to ask for seconds from her, and thirds, and fourths, and fifths."
"It was very good frog soup," said Rutabaga. "Now, let's get this guy."