You were slightly rattled as you heard loud, earth-quaking footsteps, accompanied by the unmistakable trumpeting of an elephant. In fact, as you observed, it was a whole parade of elephants marching along in the distance along the horizon. You weren’t quite sure why they were there; this field didn’t look like a savannah. But the unusual sight piqued your curiosity. Besides, it’s not like there were any other places to go, that you could see anyway.
You hurried up to the elephant parade, hoping there was somebody there who could help. Only upon getting closer did you see that the strange sight was accompanied by even stranger elephants. They looked somewhat cartoonish, with dopey grins and wide eyes. They were all seemingly painted bright pink, and oddly enough dressed up like clowns almost, with painted faces. They cheerfully marched behind each other, trumpeting loudly. The ground near them shook, and you were briefly worried they’d flatten you if you startled them. Your fears of not finding another person were alleviated somewhat though, as you saw several clowns around the elephants too. You guessed the circus must be in town, or something. Bulky men, either fat or muscular, rode around on unicycles or on top of the elephants themselves, or simply bounced or marched in formation with them. They had a wide array of colorful hair, clothing, and faces, but all seemed to be having a good time. You supposed they would, being clowns and all.
The second thing you noticed was the smell, and you wrinkled your nose in disgust. How could they smell so bad? Then you heard the glorious passing of gas from a few elephants in the group, and noticed the trail of dun some had left behind them, and rolled your eyes. Great, farting clown elephants, could this day get any weirder? Still, It was your best bet of finding anybody to talk to. Hopefully one of these clowns could stop fooling around and give you directions.
Approaching them, despite the smell assaulting your nose, you waved your arms and yelled, “Um, excuse me? A little help here?” You looked through the crowd, before seeing one particular clown, sitting on the elephant in front, gazing at you, grinning like the others. He stood up, tapped the elephant’s head with his big feet, and jumped as you watched in disbelief. He landed on the elephant’s trunk, which curled as he slid down, before flying through the air and somersaulting, landing right at your feet as he bowed with a flourish. Impressive, you thought, before the clown looked at you.
He was rather hefty, yet surprisingly nimble for his size. He looked about middle-aged you thought, with his flabby gut. He wore a tattered suit, patched with all sorts of textiles, and a top-hat with a partly torn lid that he tipped to you, exposing a bald spot on his head surrounded by curly rainbow hair. Large, ruby-red shoes covered his feet, and his hands similarly were covered in white gloves with exposed fingertips. His bright red lips and blue-colored eyes smiled warmly at you. “Howdy, son,” He said affectionately, “What can I do fer’ ya?” He reached up, grabbing his bulbous, bright red nose, which he honked twice.
You stared at him, mouth agape, still a bit surprised by the acrobatics act he had just done. He watched you, chuckling, “You could catch flies with that mouth boy.”. It quickly brought you back to your senses and you shut it, before speaking, “Uh…. Who are you?” The fat clown laughed, snapping his suspenders, “Name’s Curly, Curly the Clown. Curles to my friends though.” He gestured to the parade, “And this is my troupe. Were supposed to be performin’ at the Big Top over in Clown Town today. It’s our 300th tour to date!” He chuckled. “Your… 300th tour?” You said, a bit in disbelief. “Well, I’ve been a clown a long time boyo.”, “How long?” you asked. He smiled, “Well, just about all my life I reckon! Been one since my Daddy was in polka-dotted diapers!” He laughed, “…Course he’s always worn polka-dotted diapers, even now!” He laughed again as you stared, a bit weirded out.
Curly suddenly stuck out his hand to you, to your surprise, “I take it yer’ not from around these parts. Well, it’d be rude not to show some hospitality. Put it there, pally.” You regarded the outstretched hand hesitantly, and nervously grabbed it. Suddenly there was a buzzing shock to your palm that made you jump and recoil as Curles laughed, “Joy buzzer, oldest trick in the book!” He said, pressing the button and zapping himself to demonstrating, gigging like a lunatic. “Uh, great…” You said, a bit exasperated. Suddenly the clowny ringmaster grabbed you and shoved you under his arm, in something of a headlock. “Aw, don’t feel bad son, we all fall for that every once in a while…” He chuckled as you gagged. You were so close to his armpit, you could smell his positively nauseating B.O.. When was the last time this guy had a bath? “Just be glad I didn’t ask ya to pull my finger. Oof, I could use that. My gut’s been so full a’ gas lately.” He lifted his leg, ripping a loud fart and stinking up the place even worse. You thought you were going to be sick as he just giggled childishly, patting his rotund stomach, “Ah, that’s better.” He sighed in relief.
“Can I just, ugh, get some directions please?” You asked, trying not to be choked by stink, or the headlock he was holding you in, “Where is here anyway?”, “Why this is Clown World, son! Got elephant turds fer’ brains, boy?” You were pretty sure you had more ‘brains’ than this guy had, by a large margin. Still, you didn’t want to be too rude. So, was this supposed to be some alternate dimension or something. “Uhh, well, that’s great and all Mr. Curly--”, “Please, call me Curles. Mr. Curly was my Daddy’s name. Course, he’s never been able to spell it.” He interrupted, “Ohhh-kayyy…. Uh, Mr. Curles, is there any way out of Clown World?” He looked at you in surprise, “Now why would ya ever wanna leave? This place is great!”, “Maybe for you, but I gotta get home.” You weakly replied. Curles tapped his chin in thought, still keeping you trapped under his stinking armpit, “Well, maybe somebody in the city could help ya out then. I got a few friends who might.”, “Great, well, could you point me towards---“, “I got a better idea!” He smiled, interrupting again as he finally freed you from huffing any more of his stinky musk. “Howsabout you go with us?”
“Uhh, I think I can make it on my own…” You said, but Curles wasn’t listening. “I insist. You could even travel in a parade with us!” He laughed. “You ever been in a parade, boy?”, “Er, no, I guess not.” You confessed, “Might be fun. C’mon, wanna give it a try? You might have some fun!” You grimaced. Admittedly, it did sound kinda fun… Despite the smell that is. And if you were going to the same location, you guess it wouldn’t matter. “Uhh, fine I guess.” Curles suddenly pulled you into a headlock, dragging you back into his stink, before walking you over to the marching elephants, which smelled even worse up close! “Great! It’s settled. Yanno, we’re actually a little shorthanded, but I could always use some extra help!” He chuckled, “Don’t worry though, it’ll be easy.” He released you, leaving you gasping for air again as he laughed, “Ugh, fine, what do you want me to do?” You asked.
He scratched his chin in thought. “Hmm… Well, I’m sure I can find something. But first, some changes are in order.” He snapped his fingers. Suddenly you felt a tingle in your body, which spread, turning into a tickle. You uncontrollably grinned, suddenly giggling as you felt your body change. “Hope ya like being in the parade, boy!” Curles chuckled
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