"...I say we go right." Richard suggested, scratching his chin in thought.
"Then we shall go left," Johanna replied, not hesitating to stroll right down her chosen path.
Richard sighed, throwing his hands into the air in a gesture of aggravation, "You know, you're a bitch in more ways than one..."
"And you're lucky I need you, otherwise I would have snapped you like a twig for that..." Johanna snorted.
The tunnel was becoming darker, and a soft, chattering noise could be heard further down its length.
"Yeesh, it was just a joke you beastly woman... say, do you have the torches? It's getting darker, and that noise isn't easing my anxiety at all..."
They paused for a moment as Richard pulled out his flint and steel, striking the two together and lighting the torch that Johanna held out to him. As soon as the torch caught fire an lit the tunnel, the chattering grew into screeching as the two were swarmed by a rather small group of bats.
"Johanna! Put it out, put it out!" Richard yelled over the squealing din of their attackers, ducking his head down low to the ground and avoiding the swarm.
Johanna was far too busy panicking however, screaming and swinging the lit torch in every direction about her. She managed to take out quite a few of the pests, but they still swooped at her, startled by the light of the torch.
"Richard! Where are you, these thing are-MPH!"
Johanna's eyes widened in terrified surprise as she felt one of the winged creatures fly straight into her open mouth.
She was further surprised, though more perplexed than startled, when she realized that it tasted delicious.
She grabbed at the "bat" intruding into her mouth, and then realized that it wasn't a bat at all, but instead a roast beef sandwich, packed with meat, stuffed with gravy, and flapping its wings of lettuce. The bizarre food construct tasted so good that, instead of pulling it out of her mouth as she'd intended, she pushed it in completely, swallowing the creature whole.
"Get down Johanna! You're going to get hurt!"
"No, it's okay Richard, these thing-MMMRPH!" She was interrupted once more as another sandwich shoved it's way into her jaws. While Johanna found the situation to be extremely strange, she was still feeling oddly hungry and decided to consume this new sandwich as well. Almost as soon as she was done swallowing, licking and sucking the spilled gravy from her fingers, yet another sandwich bat dive-bombed into her maw, and Johanna opened wide as it did, letting it slide down her throat and into her hungry gut.
As Johanna was satisfying her greedy stomach, Richard cowered on the floor, his hands on top of his head. He was still unaware of the true nature of the bats, but when he heard the torch clatter to the ground, he leaped to his feet, startled. He quickly caught sight of his wolfess partner, Johanna now snatching the flying sandwiches from the air with both of her paws and stuffing them voraciously into her mouth.
Richard only stood there, puzzled at Johanna's actions. He had figured his partner needed to eat a lot to maintain her muscular physique, but even this seemed to be a bit much, even for somebody of her size. Johanna wasn't just hungry, she was ravenous, enough so to devour strange flying creatures neither of them had even seen before! He wanted to inquire about the adventurer's strange and sudden appetite, but he decided to remain silent, only watching as she grabbed the last sandwich, a tiny, squawking runt, and pushed it past her lips.
"Mmm... now that's a meal!" She said, murring with satisfaction as she patted her now even further distended stomach, the round white furred bulge sagging slightly past her belt.
"Uhh... Johanna....?" Richard said, concern permeating his words.
The wolfess stopped patting her stomach, her pleased and hedonistic grin slowly fading as she gripped her swollen paunch, "By the gods! Why does this keep HAPPENING?!"
The rogue held his hand over his mouth to stifle a laugh at her reaction, "Come on now, we can't keep delaying like this..." He snorted, his eyes filled with glee, "Besides tubbo, if we get moving maybe you can shed a few pounds!"
Johanna snarled in rage, heaving her axe into her paws and chasing the cackling rogue deeper into the caverns.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------- -----------------
A pair of gnarled hands gently hovered above a crystal scrying orb as he observed his latest guests.
His lair was receiving quite a few "Intruders" as of late, no doubt due to his network of allies spreading rumors in the taverns and inns of the land. There was the dog and the cat, the pig girl, and now these two. They seemed much more professional than the others, no doubt originating from one of the adventuring guilds or societies out there, but that didn't mean he could have a bit of fun with them.
Quite the contrary in fact, those who were more skilled, more experienced in adventuring, treasure seeking, and dungeon crawling were all the more fun to defeat! And it was always fun to throw just the right obstacles in their way and see if they could overcome them.
The Lipomancer smiled, his wicked grin visible from beneath his terrible cowl:he knew just how to deal with these two. There were many interesting things he could do to slow the adventurer's down as they traveled through his domain.
And he had plenty more tricks up his sleeve.
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