I couldn't take another picture. I, Goldie Locks, was tired! I had been in the woods for over three hours photographing the same tree from every angle I can think of. My blonde hair was messy and I ripped my skirt. Damn it all, I muttered as I threw my video camera and camera into my working bag. I didn't need this job that bad, I thought as I climbed onto my Vespa and turned the key.
vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, clunk... Oh God, please tell me this isn't happening. I turn the key again, hoping for a different result. vrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr, clunk clunk.
Double damn, I mutter to myself. Who up there hates me? First this nature assignment and now my scooter won't start. The fates are fucking with me, big time.
I remember seeing a cottage on my way to this tree. I just pray someone is at home. I sling my expensive equipment bag over my shoulder and trek back to the cottage. As I approach, I don't see much for signs of life. No cars, the lawn is over grown and covered with leaves. I just hope they have some sort of phone. I have no signal on my cell phone.
I knock on the heavy wooden door and get no answer. I begin to bang the door with my fist and it hitches open. I peek my head around the corner.
"Hello, is any one home?"
I call out. Still no answer. I go inside and sniff the air. Something is cooking. My stomach lets out a low growl. I could eat something. Maybe the owners won't notice.
I set my camera bag down and go in search of the delicious smells. I find steaming bowls of oatmeal and honey and decide to take a little bit. I nibble here and there, only to find I ate the whole bowl.
"Oh! I better leave them a couple of bucks for that..."
I turned and bump into a wall. But the wall is breathing. and it is hairy, and it wasn't there a second ago. My eyes are closed, but I am scared to open them.
"You will leave more than a couple of bucks for trespassing little girl," the wall said in a growling voice. Oh shit!
My eyes open and travel up, and up some more... until I see a huge burly man staring down at me. He is as big as that tree! I feel my legs weakening...
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