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Rated: 18+ · In & Out · Crime/Gangster · #1037077
Sheriff Andy Taylor is a Badass lawman and he won't stand a crazy mountain women.
The arguement began around midnight,the newlyweds stood in town square screaming at one another. Charlene Tanner accused her husband Chuck of winking at his former girlfriend Marge during church services. The couple grew so loud that Sheriff Andy Taylor was called in to shut down the disruption.

Andy was highly pissed as he blazed a trail from his mountain retreat into the middle of town, he swerved past the suspects and fish tailed his car straight into the local video store.
Trying to hold his composure he kicked open his door and charged at the couple.

“Chuck Tanner, what’s the meaning of this, how dare you cause this town to wake me up at this ungodly hour, I should pistol whip you and that fucking bitch!”

Chuck stammered on his words, “I’m sorry Sheriff but it’s just a lovers quarrel.”

Andy strikes him across the face,Chuck falls spraying blood, he tears up as he pulls he teeth into place.

“Sheriff please, I’ll take her home, we’ll finish this matter then just don’t hit me again!”

Charlene watches all of this and she cringes from her husband, he has been proven weak and now according to mountain folk lore she could rightly divorce him.

“You ain’t taking me with you, no sir, I’m seeking protection from the Sheriff, you go on home and leave me alone.”

Chuck reachs for his wife, his face is twisted in anger, “Listen here woman, we’ve been properly married I buried a racoon head with a monkey fetus in the garden and we said our vows under the full moon, just like the book said.”

Charlene leaps into the arms of Sheriff Andy, she refuses to listen to her sobbing husband, Andy is half asleep and in desperate need to inject his morning dose of opiates.

"You aint no good wife at all, just you wait till your daddy finds out what you done to me.!"

He ran towards the darkness of Fuller Street but quickly turned around and completely out of breath shouted.

“I curse you Sheriff Taylor you wife stealing son of a bitch, this ain’t over as long as I’m alive!”

He again flees into the darkness leaving the puzzled Sheriff holding Charlene.

“Get down from my arms harlot, I am already involved with Maria this could set her off against me and I don’t need that kind of shit tonight.”

Charlene begs the Sheriff to lead her into the woods to perform her ceremony of divorce, he wishes he would have called Deputy Fife to handle this dispute, no doubt he was still at Macy’s bar throwing back tequila shots with a few left over drug whores.


Andy returned to his car with Charlene following close behind, he radioed for Fife and waited for a response.

“Deputy Fife here Andy, what’s the damn problem?”

He was liquored up that was for sure, he sounded pretty pissed off as well, some poor hooker’s probably laying dead in a gutter somewhere, but Andy would clean that up later right now he needed some protection.

“Barney, I need you to meet me at Holland’s Bridge, we’ve gotta job to do and I need some serious backup, you down homey?”

The screams of a hog flled the airwaves, a couple of gunshots rang out,then Barney returned.

“I’ll be there in twenty minutes, just make sure you bring my blackjack, I’m gonna do it the old fashioned way tonight, you feel my power bitch?.”

The Sheriff jumped in his car, Charlene was nearly crushed against the seat as she climbed inside. Sparks flew and the tires peeled out of town square into the darkness of the mountain valley.

The dispatchers voice came over the radio as Andy pulled up to the edge of the bridge.

“Base to Sheriff, come in Andy.”

Andy sneered at his passenger as he answered, “Go ahead Ginger.”

“Sir, Aunt Bea is calling for you, she says the Draculaweregoon has returned from the dead and is breaking into your house, over.”

“Okay Ginger, you call Jerry and the death squad, tell them to use the hollow point gelatin bullets and make damn sure they tear out his heart this time, I'm sick of the mistakes!”

The radio crackled, Andy could hear Aunt Bea through the static.

“Ten-four Sheriff, Aunt Bea just wants you to hurry, she’s pretty frightened.”

“Alright Ginger, uh, have Jerry inject her with 120 cc’s of morphine upon his arrival and lock her up for the night in county, she might try to hurt someone this time, over.”

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