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Rated: 13+ · Message Forum · Writing.Com · #1355364
No sugarcoating, just the naked truth
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Apr 7, 2008 at 6:34pm
#1703411
Please Review #1409370
Hi

To be blunt I am not at all interested in being told I used the passive voice 22% of the time or my sentences tended to run on at times. The voice in the piece is the blogger "Highway Eats" and not mine.

My main reason for putting this up for review is the apparent difficulty some had in figuring out the real plot in this piece. To make it plainer, I put a few hints at the start which, I would have hoped, might help the reader to look past the surface of the story.

I even gave a character a surname (which, at least to American's of a certain age) should be a dead give-away. Even that was not enough in one instance.

Will you get it?

Is this a challenge?

Actually, it is.

KAWFEEDAVE (checkoff)
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Please Review #1409370 · 04-07-08 6:34pm
by checkoff Author IconMail Icon

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