I imagine your's a common problem for which there aren't any easy answers. It's a good thing to talk about though because it's something we all face to some degree or other.
I am lucky enough to work part time so I have a more time to write than I would otherwise. Also, my kids are out of the house, so that frees me up too. I'm taking a creative writing course at Harvard Extension School as a way of sharpening my skills. At the same time I don't have high expectations for publishing. If I got a one or two shorts into some obscure journals I'd be thrilled.
On the other side of the equation I'm at a stage in my life where I don't expect to advance much in my career, although I do want to keep it interesting.
Relatively low expectations in both areas allow me to enjoy my work more often than not and throw myself into writing without too much pressure. But that doesn't sound like an option for you right now.
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