House of Reviews

One thing, while I'm thinking about it--"a sight for sore eyes" means that it's a great relief to see what you're seeing. The killer's ugly face is clearly not a welcome sight. Such cliches need to be cut out altogether, though, because they are such tired expressions that they do nothing for the narration.

The prose is smooth and competent, and the idea of the drug that both paralyzes and heightens pain is truly frightening. So frightening, in fact, that there is no need for the other story line, the massacre at the party. That entire portion of the story could come from any slasher film ever made, and really should just be cut--especially since there is no relation between the two killers except that they both happen to attack the same unlucky person. That is a coincidence readers are not likely to accept, and it really doesn't have much impact other than to be far-fetched.

Concentrate on the doctor and his drug. They are the best things in here (although he is barely developed), and do not deserve to be in the background. That story line is far more original and interesting than that of the standard slasher. One question you will need to answer is this: how exactly does he know that the drug heightens sensation? How has he determined/tested that? Presumably the victims can't tell him.

Thanks very much for posting, and I do apologize for the delay in reviewing this.