Red Opium.

So, I moved to college. I'm living with three international room mates. They see me as a very weird american and don't blink an eye at anything I do, like bring girls over and go around all gothed out in my bondage gear and fun stuff like that. I've even had some pretty good political discussions with one of them.

Just being in a world where no one blinks an eye or questions all the stuff that I do and how I dress. Where I'm accepted for who I am instead of looked down upon. It's just made a complete difference. I'm able to be more open and free about who I really am. It's such a great feeling that I've never gotten a chance to feel before when I lived at home with my parents. Where they'd ask me way too many questions, like where I go, who I hang out with, and even what we talked about and stuff like that.

There's a ton of drama (as usual) going on in the st.louis teen lesbian community again at the support groups and coffee shops. I currently have two of my ex's spreading stuff about me and getting people to not be my friend and even hate me. But even with all of this stuff going on, for once in my life, I am not feeling the slightest bit suicidal, or even like I want to SI. All of my hair has grown back from my major trichotillomania incidences that happened over the summer. It's just been very weird to have the same stuff, some of it even worse, going on, and I don't feel like hurting or killing myself.

The main difference, that makes all of the difference in the whole world, is that I'm somewhere where I'm accepted.

~Without rain, there'd be no rainbows.~