Spring 2006 SLAM! - Congrats to the winners - see you all next time! |
"To Dance With Grief" It seems as if we are stalled by our grief, unable to move away from it – and I wonder if we will ever get over the loss of you. In time they say we will, that one day we will finally be free of the sadness that burdens our hearts, and we will dance in our remembrance, and there will be no more tears. But if that's true, I must admit I will miss the tears when there is an eventual easing of the grief. I am not as eager to begin the dance of life without you, for the world has lost its wonder for me, some of its shine - and being free seems awfully relative - I suppose just like time. I can still so clearly recall the last time we were all together - the tears we shared, even laughter, when you were set free of this earthly pain - and even in our grief, we were filled with such wonder as we witnessed the end of life's dance. When I was a little girl you used to let me dance on the top of your shoes, moving in time to the music on the radio. Is it any wonder that music, to this day, brings tears of joy, mingled with the ever-present grief, which still has not set me completely free. I now realize there is a cost to love, it's not free - for when you love, you buy a ticket to the dance of life - which comes with joy and pain, celebration and grief. And if you have lived a long enough time, as I have, even when the loss brings neverending tears, with a broken heart, it's worth all of the pain, and it's no wonder people love so fiercely - so much so that they cease to wonder about the why, when or where - and now I realize that I am free to love, and to lose, which will bring with it many tears. But each tear is worth it - and seems to make the dance more authentic. In the end, I will measure my time by how much of it was filled with love, and with grief. No longer will I wonder whether or not I should dance, I will just be free, stepping in and out of time, wearing my tears like a badge of honor as I move beyond the grief. Sophurky |