Red Opium.

Hi Cat, it's nice to meet you!!

There is someone I have known for nine years and we have been best friends the whole time. You always respect your friends, at least at first. My friend saw scars on my arm (right under my panda tattoo) and asked what they were from. I, still being ashamed of this, told her I thought they were from a cat. She said something like "Oh, I thought maybe you were one of those cutters or something." Then she started laughing. I laughed too to make it seem less suspicious. I don't know if she bought it or not.

She was also telling me about her cousin who was cutting herself and her aunt wanted her to take zoloft for it. My friend made a big deal of it saying it was an attempt to get attention and that drugs weren't going to help her.

I lost a lot of respect for my friend after that. But I'm lucky that I do have some friends who understand what I have gone through.

I'm happy to say I haven't cut since August and depression seems to have taken a long vacation though I know it is something that is going to be with me for the rest of my life no matter how many vacations it takes!

However I do find the drawing thing you mentioned strange because that is exactly how my cutting started out. I used to draw all over my hand and my arm and then I stared carving into the wall with a thumb tack. After that it was my arm. Before I actually started cutting I would bang my head against my wall. I know this may seem like a stupid question but...why would anyone do that for attention?

Again, it's great to meet you!!


Elaine





Elaine Bradley