Forgiveness

He stood at the edge of the jagged rocky cliff and peered down in a lifeless thought. He saw a beautiful green and blue waves smashing violently against sharp gray rock. The wind blew hot air against him in swift gusts and his blue tattered jacket swayed along with it. He was cold. Not in a literal sense because it was 70 degrees out, but cold inside. He reached up and held his hard cold hands to his chest and rubbed them together making a noise of two pieces of sand paper rubbing together. His hands were dry. He held and rubbed his hands close to his heart as if he were trying to sooth and warm his heart. But he knew that nothing that simple could make his heart feel better, to go back to normal, the way things use to be. How he longed and wished and hoped that things would be better, they weren’t going to get any better unless he were to forgive. If he just forgave himself, forgave her for leaving so abruptly, to forgive the world that he was so mad at. Just simple forgiveness, they told him would set him free, but he had something else in mind. He looked down at a single oval pebble that had wiggled loose from the mountains jagged edge mountain and tumbled down to the green ocean below. He peered up into the dark blues sky and into the milky clouds in deep thought, then in a sudden hesitant motion stepped off the edge. Down he fell.

“These tears I cry,
are loads of pain,
from all the plans we made.
The unintended hurt, the blame.
I now weep until I feel so alone.
Now I'm lost,
And your my only way home.
And in the end,
darkness came,
September arose,
those chilling words.
Forever dark...
There's no way home.
I want to love,
and to hold you high.
...these tears I cry,
are sorts of pain,
that should have never came.
Distance destroyed,
what I tried to maintain.
And now I'm lost,
please help me find home...
In your heart...
I can never go home...”
-unknown

Forgiveness in a relationship of love is essential. We all make mistakes and we must make amends and fix the relationship. There is certain sadness in breaking the illusion of the perfect relationship. However, for those that pass the hurdle of forgiveness, they will find that their relationship is stronger and more meaningful than ever before. Before the first fight, the relationship is very fragile. Once that illusion is broken the relationship becomes much stronger and meaningful. You become aware that your relationship can survive a disagreement, or argument but it is much harder to survive a mistake that leads to death, especially a death of a child.