Your entry made me want to cry. I am so sorry you lost such the company of your adored cat. Putting down an animal is such a heart wrenching thing to do.
The last thing you are is average. But then you know how I feel about you, or you should. I'm gonna be blunt, even though I have a feeling you won't like it, at least at first.
You can't look to anyone else for confirmation of you. PEOPLE will let you down every single stinkin' time, that's how we're made. You let people down too, as does everyone, because we can't help it, it's part of the "sin" thing.
You can look to a Higher Power for the fortification you need, or you can find it inside yourself...but you'll never get it from someone else. Only when you're whole all by yourself will there be a time when that "someone" will come along--because then you'll be ready.
Walls are not always bad things. In my years of living I've learned when to erect the wall to keep myself intact; those who don't learn the skill are destined for constant pain, and who wants to go through life like that?!
I love you lots--you'll get through it and find sunshine, again. And remember that someone in Illinois is pulling for you always.
Don't worry about depressing posts. Life can't always be perfect, and blogs are the best place to vent. (((Hugs))) That's so sad what Celina's ex did. I'm sorry your little brother has to go to Iraq. I can't imagine how hard that will be for you. I love my little sis and brother and will do anything to protect them. I'll be praying for you.
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