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 |  This is my blog & my hope, writing daily will help me see my progress and log supporters. |
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| Considering I am a (former) meth addict, I don't use many drugs. Marijuana makes me paranoid and alcohol turns me into an asshole. I quit both drugs many years ago. Cigarettes are not, and never were, my thing, and after a brief time smoking in my teens, I stopped and never went back. A broken femur when I was seventeen saw me become addicted to painkilling opioids like Pethadine and Omnopon. But once the leg healed enough so that I no longer required any painkilling injections, I never used opioids again. I've never been a fan of pharmaceuticals and only ever took them for the purpose they were prescribed. When I arrived in Thailand one year ago, I could go to any pharmacy in Phuket and buy Benzodiazapam without a prescription. The drug helped me cope with the withdrawals from meth and the acute psychosis I was experiencing at that time. Once I moved to Hua Hin, I stopped using Valium. It's unavailable over the counter here and I realised I was becoming dependent on them. The symptoms of psychosis, whilst diminishing over time, continued after moving to Hua Hin, so I went to see a Psychiatrist who prescribed an antipsychotic called Seroquel. The drug only made my symptoms worse, and after just a few weeks, I decided to discontinue using it. It wasn't just the increased hallucinations that brought me to that decision. The side effects were overwhelming. I developed a movement disorder in my legs, akathisia and a dry mouth. Fear of gaining weight also played a part. In short, the negative effects far outweighed any promised benefits and after three days of withdrawals, I swore I would never take antipsychotics again. These days, I only take one medication (Cialis) for erectile dysfunction, and I've started to notice some side effects. Once again, the issue is with my legs, and after taking the drug, I feel a dull ache in my quadriceps. I also experience pain in my feet, which could be gout. Cialis doesn't just help with ED. It also helps with urination issues associated with an enlarged prostate. Nada is convinced I don't need to take Cialis and recommends ginger and garlic. ED isn't a major issue (for her), but taking a medication like Cialis doesn't just help me physically, but mentally as well. It gives me confidence in the bedroom and the feeling that I won't 'fail' my girlfriend. While I know that isn't an issue for her, as a man who cares about having a satisfying sexual relationship, it does play on my mind. If there is one thing that's a constant when taking meds, it's that nothing comes for free and there will always be a price to pay for any benefit gained. |
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