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 |  Pearls of wisdom, inappropriate thoughts and the occasional rant. |
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| Due to jet lag, which I didn't even know is a real concept, I slept my way through day 8. So here I am in Jamaica on day 9. The Black River safari was quite an adventure, but I have no desire to get that close to a crocodile again. The weather surprised me. I thought it would be a scorching heat, but it more humid than anything else. Thank goodness 🌻 pwheeler ~ love joy peace brought extra bug spray. She's a life saver! We had a traditional lunch on the river bank that included jerk pork. It was a first for me and tasted divine! I'm glad we had a 30 minute trip to the next leg of the expedition, because I needed a little nap. 💙 Carly - February is here! was nice enough to let me doze on her shoulder. Hopefully I didn't snore. The YS Falls were breathtaking. I didn't realize how loud a waterfall was, but it was relaxing too. We're getting ready to head to the Appleton Estate now, so I'll have to check in later. Cheers! |
| I don't know why I bother getting excited about anything. I've been yearning to get away and have a little time for myself or at least spend time with my best friend, which only happens once a year. Silly me! Of course, it's not going to happen. Nope. My job is to be on call 24 hours a day, 7 days a week, 365 days a year to take care of everyone else. Because you know, I don't have a real job, with a real income. It was bad enough that I was going to have to wait to go to the mountains until Friday night so I could make sure Hubby has a ride home from work and turn around and come home Sunday night so I could get him to work Monday morning, but now I've been informed next weekend is mandatory overtime. I can't even get my own fucking mother to help me out for two days. Hubby's thrilled at the OT. Well, of course, he is, because it means he'll have an extra $300 to blow on bullshit. I was so happy when we finally got a new vehicle. My first brand new car. Dependable. No more getting stuck for 4 hours because it won't start or walking to the damn convenience store to buy overpriced toilet paper. I could finally take the kids to all the fun educational things we've been missing out on. Except I can't. Because I have to be at his work Monday thru Friday at 4pm to pick him up and it's pretty impossible to get through DFW traffic and home by that time. And I swear to all that is holy, the next fucking person that has a smart ass comment about how lucky and grateful I should be to be a stay at home mom is going to get punched in the throat. Don't you think I'd like to work? To be around actual adults instead of trying to teach two spoiled teenagers how to be productive, happy grown-ups? To have my own income so I'm not worried about whether or not I can afford to buy a new bra? In case you think I'm being dramatic, just let me tell you that I have to go to a damn special department store for mine because my size isn't carried at the regular everyday shops. And those things aren't cheap! Most of the time I can find a buy one, get one half price deal- for about $85 total. Yeah, I can't just pop over to Target and find a cheap one. Have you ever had an underwire break in public? No? Imagine standing in the grocery checkout line and suddenly having the soft underside of your flesh pierced by a 40mm metal wire. The first instinct is to pull the shrapnel out of your skin, but when you do, what was once held in place now pours freely like a dam collapsing. Then you must attempt to hold everything in place and appear normal while calculating an emergency exit strategy without drawing attention to yourself because you live in a small town where everyone knows what you had for lunch before you even eat it. By the way, did you know that you can't just toss this $50 bra in the washer & dryer and be on your way? Nope. Even though it's built like a bear trap, it must be washed by hand or alone on delicate, then it has to air dry. Plus, you can't just fold it up in a drawer or hang it in the closet, it has to lay a certain way or it will lose elasticity and shape. Two of my bras take up an entire dresser drawer. So yes- I would love to go off to work each day and be a part of society. I would love to -hold the phone- by something a little frivolous. But I can't because I was cursed with so many health issues. Although not enough issues to get a little medical help from the government. Hell, there's a myriad of people that collect disability checks because they're sad, stupid, or crazy. My body literally attacks itself and there's no cure. I'll show them crazy! It shouldn't be too hard, I've been unmedicated for six years because I can't afford health insurance or happy pills. I'm so pissed I don't even know how the hell I ended up talking about underwear and manic depression. Fuck it. I'm going to bed. Maybe I can sleep the weekend away. Cheers, assholes. |
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but seems to be okay today. I worry about my poor circulation, scrub my toes with a soft bristle brush, watch discoloration come and go. I probably need new arteries or veins but hey... "Heathcare" USA (enough said?). I may be better off trying something here in Thailand. But still... wish I lived in a country that had adequate patient based healthcare. Thailand and Taiwan mostly do, but I can't access it. First world systems like Europe, Canada and Australia do, but again, I can't access it. 