Proclamations & Confessions

I'm not a big celebrity watcher and I don't keep up with Kardashians or whoever, but I have seen numerous people on (the dreaded) FaceBook making grand, heartfelt posts about the death of Marvel writer Stan Lee. But he's not.

Honestly, one of the reasons I dislike FB is because of the circulation of shit like this. Does no one check the facts anymore? Do we really just believe whatever the hell we hear and blindly trust the media? I can kind of understand that, but trusting social media outlets seems outright idiotic. Yes, I have FB account. I enjoy interacting with long distance family members on the site. And checking out Jackass's new girlfriends are always a hoot! It's not so amusing to see my mother share five asinine news stories without blinking an eye.

But I can't tell you how embarrassing it is to see someone proclaim that "Insert Name of Medication or Random Food" nearly killed the child of a close friend. The ones really piss me off are the claims that "Insert Name of Best Friend's Neighbor" child was nearly kidnapped by sex traffickers in the local Walmart. But it's all good because the parent saw the suspicious looking man eyeing the kid with his cell phone (apparently he will send a picture of the kid to a cohort in the parking lot) and nothing happened, but said parent is on social media sharing her horror story with strangers to warn parents not to let their child wander off from them in the store. Or better yet, just don't shop there anymore! Really?
No one ever seems to question this story. Even though it's retold nearly the same way every time.

Oh, but the comments!
Sue tagged Ann saying, "You better not take Maddie to Walmart, she's too pretty and sweet, they'll grab her for sure!" Because apparently only pretty little angelic girls are snatched by sex traffickers.
Newsflash Sue: ill-tempered girls and boys going through that awkward stage get kidnapped too.

Now a couple of months ago in my very own town, someone circulated this story. This lady took it a step further and said the police came out and talked to her and got a good description of the man. Then, they told her they were aware of the problem because our store is in such a dangerous area.
Except, of course, that the whole story was bullshit.
In fact, our police department reached out to this woman and encouraged her to come on in and "finish the paperwork" on the alleged report, because they didn't have any record of the incident. Neither did the store. Wait it gets better! The dumb bitch drove to the station with alcohol on her breath. She proceeded to tell the LEOs that weren't doing a good job of protecting the "nice" residents from the "nasty Mexicans" and people in "her class" shouldn't have to shop at the same Tom Thumb as them. As she was finishing her privileged temper tantrum, she dropped her $800 purse, spilling the contents. Guess what was in there? Nearly an ounce of meth, a handgun she didn't have a CHL for, and a bottle Xanax with the label torn off. Oh, and this high-class woman didn't even have any children. Thankfully.

So yeah, maybe we should all double check a few facts before we start spreading the news.

Note: If Stan Lee is really dead and the sources I got my facts from were false, then I'm going to look like a moron.
But it still kind of proves my point.

Cheers.