My blog of half-important thoughts and consistent communication practice. |
There was never much hope. Just a fool's hope. ~Gandalf I'm not going to lie to you I don't have a plan for this blog, but a purpose does seem to be slowly emerging. I'll give my thoughts on this and that: maybe politics, a little religion, and talk about cultural touchstones that are important to me. Overall though I am going to be as personal as I feel comfortable sharing with the internet. This is going to result in some raw ideas coming up that may need to be cooked for longer, but I am not trying to write a perfect tome at the moment. Okay, listen up. Umm...You're a bunch of dirty misfits. But you're all that's left, so you'll have to do. ~Cayde-6 Writing is my passion and working on this blog has become a therapeutic source to me. I owe a lot to everyone who has read this blog; I don't know what interest first brought you here, however, I thank you for the time. Do or do not. There is no try. ~Yoda |
Doubts At the End of the Year I don't know if I will be able to write a bad draft before the week is over. I wish I had more time. It's all been such a struggle this month to post, and I had such high hopes of writing a couple of short stories and a few bad poems. The start of this month was so good, but I just haven't been able to capture that energy again. Yet hope is not dead. I have a couple of ideas; I just need to write regardless of the quality at the end. And if I must submit a first draft simply to make the deadline, I must remember that my livelihood is not dependent on winning these contests. But I need to overcome this doubt, this self-destructive mindset that feels crippled with everything around me. I just feel alone and don't feel like I can reach out. I know I can— and should— reach out; I just don't know how. I don't know what I want, and I don't know what it would look like if I did reach out. What am I even looking for? I don't want a handout, but I can't do this alone. And I feel so alone. What the Next Year Holds Goinging into the new year, this blog will shift to a Saturday-only schedule. December has been really taxing on me, and maintaining a daily blog throughout has cost me more than the gaping hole in the wall beside me. It's hardly the fault of this blog. It was just the last thing I sat down to do at the end of a day when things hadn't gone right, and I had no patience left for the minor problems I suffered and made worse through my actions. Public Regret I have done very little promotion of this blog in the newsfeed and my own social circles. And if I can be honest to the readers who have stumbled onto this blog, I am sorry to have not posted my best here. Truly, I don't know how this blog has been worth reading for you as strangers when I don't even want my friends and family to see this (wholely out of embarrassment). I'm tired... I wish there was a happier tone to this blog with useful information. Merry Christmas and a happy new year. Memento Mori, KS ** Images For Use By Upgraded+ Only ** |