Enga mellom fjella: where from across the meadow, poems sing from mountains and molehills. |
Sentinel Marked as if you own me I bow before the Bitterroots and just like you my rocky soil, my withered grass lays prey to the empty sky. © Kåre Enga 2007 "Sentinel" Reader's Choice of Poems: "Sentinel" "Where grows the compost heap" "Between us" "Speak soft my name" "Wheat penny" Reader's Choice of blog entries from my old blog "L'aura del Campo" : "Death of Jeannie New Moon" "Doing and don'ting. A scene in 2nd person." "When is it proper to tell someone you love them?" "Holy day. Autumn in November. A mole." "Guitarman, a gift for Gary. Aaron Marable's art." FACES PLACES Kåre Enga ~ until everything was rainbow, rainbow, rainbow! And I let the fish go. ~ Elizabeth Bishop The Fish |
me: Bug day. Landlord is spraying. I've only seen 4 since they sprayed a couple weeks ago. I was expecting more. But... it was time to spray again regardless. Slush. About 3 inches. Mountains are white and beautiful. Skies and streets are grey. Another sci-fi book. Light reading. Sat down and worked on "there comes a softening..." again. I have quite a few proto-poems. Still don't know what I'll do tomorrow. There are various dinners I can go to for Thanksgiving Day. Or... I could just stay home and have a salmon burger... Today is a day I make phone calls. Already talked to my mother. Hard to catch other folks though. I don't use my phone every day. Saving quite a bit of money by not using my phone every day. My mother in Buffalo says that all the snow is gone. Wind and warm weather but they were spared from severe flooding. Now cold again. Still undecided about game on Saturday. I'll go or not go. It would be something to do. Holidays may be wonderful for some folks but they are dreary for me. I don't celebrate them in general (Thanksgiving I have in the past but no family here) so I'm not caught up in the hysteria that surrounds anything and everything in this consumer society. The religious side of it? I feel left out. And some of the customs annoy me at best. So... I slog through this upcoming 4 weeks. Usually by traveling. Apparently... not this year. |
The pants to the suit I wore yesterday were a tad tight. And then I ate a full meal! ME: It snowed lightly. Now it's slush. I don't care much for cold rain. 37º. Not today! Grey skies forever? Not. It just seems that way. In going through photos I get to revisit all the cats I've visited in various countries. Still need to sort and throw lots of stuff out. My bedding will be sprayed again tomorrow. Not too many bugs... but they are not entirely gone. It may upset some folks but I do not like to think of Thanksgiving as a pro-military Christian only event. So when someone chooses to open a dinner with a prayer that excludes me I'm very unhappy. I may go to the game Saturday. Forecast for game time? 22º and possible flakes. Not exactly ideal... but doable. The other team is U of San Diego where it usually is around 70º. The Torreros are in for a cold day. Especially if the Griz play like they did last Saturday. It was a 34-7 rout. Totally unexpected. The town quiets down when the students are away. It snoozes as many take this week off to visit family or friends. The main game other than football is shopping. And I don't shop... I checked prices for a month long stay in Tromsø in January/February: $2,000 minimum. Three festivals (film, music, Sami... including a reindeer race). Tempting but expensive. If not this year next? Bingo... it must be Tuesday. 52,587 |
...wish me luck. Me: It may be rainy and cold tomorrow for the GAME. UM is trying to get into the playoffs. If they lose they stay home. My perfect scenario? UM wins and Idaho State wins and ISU comes to Montana next Saturday. MSU and EWU will both get bids. Nick messaged me asking whether I want to go to the game... feeling a little down and weak at the moment but I said yes. I like Nick's company and he's being generous and I have nothing else planned. There will be about 26,000 at the game regardless. This is number 114. Unfortunately, rain doesn't help UM. They play poorly in the rain. But it is at home. Then again, they lost the last two times they played MSU at home. I do not understand the hysteria over immigration. Those that are opposed most vehemently are latter-day immigrants of European descent. Posted more photos of May 20th in Røros, Norway. Hopefully I'm done. Over 100 photos for a few hours. I still have lots of photos from Portugal to manage. I wish... I really wish. A bit depressed and tired. I'll be fine. Maybe take a nap? I mean... I ate a good meal, sat with a good friend... I have little or nothing to complain about. Day is dreary but I'm not in control of that. I'm sure my English friends could say much about that! I should just be thankful. |
... for the moment. It looks like it's precipitating just north of here. Above freezing but now dropping. May get over 40º tomorrow; snow next Tuesday. ME: And lots of it! My mother said there's 5 foot where she lives in Amherst north-eat of Buffalo. More to the south where my sister lives and where my friend Gare lives in West Seneca it's much much worse. Been ages since I received one. It helps to do something that deserves one though! I keep promising I'll do more... They lit up the old Van Buren Bridge last night. Emma Lommasson flipped the switch. She's hale and hearty and 102. Need to sort out writing and travel brochures. The brochures help if I can't remember names of streets, sights, buildings, statues... My friends who married in other states (Hawai'i, Washington, New York) are celebrating as Montana now recognizes same-sex marriages. Not much kerfluffle here. But how am I? Saw a bug yesterday. Still, no insanity like before. My neighbors still see them so it'll take some time. But how am I... really? Mostly okay, but I get tired. My temp goes up and down like a yo-yo. BUT... Okay, okay. I take whatever joy there is in the moment. At Spanish circle, I met a young woman from Slovakia who has lived in Ireland and is a delight to talk to. Reminds me that I need to book some travels. It takes time. If I want to go somewhere in mid-December I may be too late already and mid-January should be arranged now. If I could just take off today? I'd visit Buffalo! |
Me: I may or may not do something for Thanksgiving. I don't like large crowds and I feel awkward at other people's events... So, we'll see. Next Monday is the big dinner at the Senior Center. Price is right but the crowds... I'm not a beach person. Don't like barefoot but sandals? I grew up preferring to walk in socks (on heated floors). I'm not a beach person 2: but I like walking along the beach collecting, observing, taking photos. I really need to send out some of my This and Every November chapbooks; but to whom? Who would like one? As in pig-out? Ribs for lunch. One main meal for $3 and I'm mostly satisfied. I get enough meat 5 lunches a week I really don't need anymore. I don't bake. As a child I made breadsticks and pies. It would be nice... It's been a wee milder here. Back east in Western New York they are getting clobbered. I'll probably call tomorrow to hear the stories. Big storms were an event when I was a child. We all had Snow Stories. |
...isn't bliss. mE: I went to the Second Wind reading last night. Max read poetry and Richard read a first chapter from his book that will come out in 2016. Went well. But... not one person said hello me! Max did wave as I was leaving. But I sat there in silence alone. Montana writers... one needn't fear that they will come over and talk to you... I've been going to these events for years. No real snews: Nice to visit with a student studying Chemistry yesterday and read a vampire story to her. Bugs? What bugs? Haven't seen any. I mentioned this oddity to my landlord today. It's been a week. Very odd. All I have at home is Lapsang Souchong tea. Not bad. It went below freezing on the 10th. It has not been over freezing since. Last night put on my below-zero hat with flaps that Mandy sent me years ago. That cold... Right now it's 24º and may, I say may, go above freezing come Friday. The new computers at the Senior Center have issues... 'nough said. If I say anything nasty I'm afraid they'll retaliate. I do like silence. Quiet is restful; but, I am perplexed by the MFA students here... and the professors... and many of the authors... Maybe it's just me but they seem to lack certain social skills. Which on an individual level I strive to understand. But when there's an event I find it past annoying. If I wanted cold pricklies... |
...of the heart... me: I had to get up and write thoughts down in the middle of the night. "There comes a softening..." Then I made a list of hard things that go soft (X rated even, but I need to go beyond cliché). I felt like my inner Emily Dickinson was coming out... but, in the middle of the night? Lilith:a snake in the grass by Jack. L Chalker. A bit of sci-fi fantasy. I took $200 out of the bank and my receipt said I could take more... Only spent $20 in phone calls since September 25th. Not bad. If I could just hitch a ride... somewhere... cheap... warm... The Griz of UM won today 35-17 so the town is calm and looking forward to next weeks HUGE game against MSU. Beard is growing a bit long... folks are starting to call me Santa. The bank thermometer read 23º, which is as warm as it's been recently. My rooms have been cold (I don't turn on the heat or it's too hot). I bought a bedspread yesterday and that helps tremendously. I even wore the bathrobe too and fro the tub. Nothing like a good hot soak. Took my throwaway paperback with me. Should take a candle! 52,544 |
...so I'll just have to be me. Me... simply me... Of course, I still have to figure out who I am. At my age you'd think that that would be easy. And... may I say... it is easier in a way. But so many years of having to conform to other people's expectations... and worse, my own... at times, I not so sure. Woke up to very light snow in the air. Big flakes are lovelier but I shan't complain. The north channel of the river that flows past my place is clogged. The water is flowing down the south channel where it seldom does. Channels might shift. I shan't worry much. I just posted 70 photos from Barga, Portugal at facebook. Even if I don't get to travel this winter, I still have thousands of photos to remind me of voyages past. I shan't be bored. The landscape of marriage in the U.S. is changing day-to-day. But unless someone offers... I shan't be scared. I'm writing on page 3.892 in Book 44 of my journal (a neverending letter to a friend started December 9, 2003). I shan't stop yet. I can become scattered brained and start tasks and not complete them. Also, I'm an idea person more than an accomplisher. I note my successes when I can. Since I often become depressed, this helps. 52,537 |
Moi: Called Joyce here in Missoula. 1º according to her this morning. Called Gare in Buffalo. He's my ray of sunshine. Sunny here. Called my mother in Buffalo. About an inch at 9 a.m. Called my aunt in North Carolina. Leaves were lovely last weekend. My day to make calls. Who's next? My place is slowly going back to normal, but this is a great opportunity to make changes, so I will. Must go... lost entry as I was about to post and now they are closing... |
...went to bed early, got up early after tossing and turning, lay down for a few minutes, almost missed lunch! Me mE Me mE: I didn't do much yesterday. At home I got a few books out of the freezer and put a few more in them. The outdoors freezer should last a week. A late evening coffee is suspect #1 in tossing and turning. Unresolved issues is #2. I remembered to slightly water the geraniums. They are blooming. I've neglected watering while I focused on other issues. I actually wrote a ditty last night; "Extermination" is it's provisional title. Edited photos of a church courtyard in Braga, Portugal. I'm at the Senior Center again. Chatted with friends. Catching up on-line. It's still sunny and very cold outside. It was 3º this morning; now 15º. 52,513 |