Can We Talk 2

FLYing

         I have always clung to the motto "Dull women have immaculate homes." I have the cluttered closets and cabinets to prove I'm a slob. I have lots of excuses for why at various stages of my life, unexpected company was an embarrassment to me. I adore Martha Stewart, but aside from a recipe here and there, I am not her disciple. I admired Marie Kondo for a moment, then decided she is just another person to make the average person, more specifically, woman, feel like a failure. Now I have discovered the FLY lady just from reading one of the thousands of articles on clutter.

         The FLY lady has been around for years, but I only discovered her a few weeks ago. FLY stands for finally loving yourself. The words that really grabbed me and pulled me in went something like this: Your house/garage/ body/whatever didn't get this way overnight. You aren't going to change it overnight. All you can do is a little bit at a time. We must take baby steps, and we forgive ourselves when we mess up.

         Basically, it's behavior modification, but it's an attitude adjustment, too. You don't get it all at once. You start with a few tiny daily habits. You "declutter" 15 minutes at a time. Drinking water and any kind of exercising are part of the daily habits. The house is divided into 5 zones. I haven't been through zone 1 or 5 yet, so I don't know how that will work out, since the month isn't long enough to do 5 whole weeks. Zone 5 will always be a little short on days, zone 1 may or may not, depending on the calendar. I have noticed a difference in less than two weeks.

         Heavy duty chemicals or special cleaners are not important. The most important ingredient is elbow grease. She sells mops, rags, and dusters, but they are not essential. You can use anything you like. She even suggests using shampoo left from traveling, or bubble bath someone gave you that you don't like, or other soaps you don't intend to use can be used to clean your bathroom. Another example of this soap is cleaning the kitchen counters. (She says soap is soap.) Use one rag in your soapy water to wipe down your empty counters. Use another plain wet rag to wipe up the soap. Use a third dry rag to wipe up the residue and dry the counter.

         The FLYing system includes cleaning out your purse every Friday (it's easy when done weekly), getting the trash out of your car on Friday and doing a light dusting. This does not mean dumping your purse or washing your car or vacuuming it weekly. It means getting out receipts, notes, dirty tissues, and for right now, disposable gloves and masks. On Tuesday you pay bills and plan your weekly menus. I haven't gotten through a whole week yet. but I have done 3 days in advance. That allows me to thaw meat out and plan leftovers.

         I don't know how people who work get through all this, but I'm finding I have more guilt-free time to read or do a crossword. I've mentally checked off my to do list. The house is not perfect. I'm plagued with thoughts of the garage and the shed and the yard. But when I've followed the schedule, I give myself permission to take a break. I was never a perfectionist in action, but most of us are in our minds. If we couldn't fix the whole problem immediately, we got frustrated and gave in. This system allows us to be methodical and make small improvements. We reward ourselves mentally (loving ourselves). Instead of obsessing or complaining to our families, we are more relaxed and can bless them with an organized, comfortable home.