Complex Numbers

What Is Art?

What... is "art?"

https://www.cracked.com/pictofacts-1570-dumb-things-people-misunderstand-about-f...

Dumb Things People Misunderstand About Famous Works Of Art

We all know insufferable people who claim to understand Art with a capital A, and who deliver condescending lectures to the rest of us. But the thing is, sometimes the thing people commonly believe about famous art stuff is objectively wrong.

Nothing profound, deep or intellectually challenging today. Just a fun Cracked link. Also, not much to quote, but I'll share my own thoughts about these. Unfortunately, to understand what I'm saying, you might need to actually click on the link (open it in a new window so you can switch back and forth if you want). If you can't be arsed (or you don't want to open a link that contains a few fine-art boobies), just give this one a miss. I won't mind. Hell, I won't even know.

Also, while Cracked links have thus far been eternal, with the departure of David Wong, who knows how long the site will last? Check these out while you can.

For anyone unfamiliar with Cracked, they have user-generated content from time to time, usually in the form of a Photoshop or caption contest related to a certain theme. This is one of the latter.

30. Yeah, see, the thing about Art is that you can't really control how people use it, copyright issues notwithstanding (memes tend to fall under parody/fair use, but for fuck's sake this isn't legal advice). Witness the chick who did the surreal painting of a pear with a mouth.  

29. I say that painting is hanging upside-down. How could one ever tell?

28. Damn. There goes another cherished misconception.

27. I wonder if Theo knew how to pronounce his surname. We certainly can't agree on it.

26. So that's how it is in their family. This makes the Rocky Horror parody even more amusing.

25. Pretty sure that doesn't improve anything.

24. Da Vinci: pioneer of gender studies.

23. Right, because Camembert cheese reminds me of time. As an aside, I own a functioning Melting Clock. Well, it's functioning when I bother to stick batteries in the thing.

22. Probably his neighbor's much larger penis.

21. Thus inspiring fetish furniture for the rest of time.

20. "But the art form was driven by religion rather than juvenile horniness." Hey, it's Rome; why not both?

19. And this is why no one appreciates art.

18. Nope. Definitely aliens. I could go into a discussion of how the modern obsession with aliens is a tech-era upgrade of the older obsession with angels, but a) it would take too long and b) I'm pretty sure I've done it elsewhere.

17. Well, you can see how well that worked out.

16. Actually knew that.

15. Maybe he saw in his mind the pronunciation of his surname, and it made him insane?

14. Why No One Appreciates Art: The Sequel.

13. Picasso was a massive horndog.

12. "Serene moment of life?" That painting always filled me with existential dread, much moreso than Munch's "The Scream," but I would never have figured out that meaning.

11. Either way, I don't get it.

10. Why No One Appreciates Art: Everyone's a Critic.

9. Well, at least they died doing what they loved. Each other.

8. Oh, sure, that's obvious. NOT.

7. Hey, whatever happened to the little girl statue someone put in front of the bull? Oh, someone moved it  , thus changing its meaning because art depends on context.

6. No wonder Charles X is in a wheelchair.

5. You could say it was all a *puts on sunglasses* varnishing act.

4. Personally, I always imagined that statue on a porcelain throne, because I'm actually 12.

3. At least the original one doesn't include Jesus.

2. But WHY?

1. If you scream too long into the abyss, the abyss screams also into you.

I'll just wrap this up by saying I didn't exactly fact-check any of these. They could be utter bullshit. But at least they're amusing.