All that remains: in afterlife as 'mainstream' blogger, with what little I know. 20k views |
When I Arrived (Note: I'm still working on this) Remember that summer He took us to the Tastee Freez After helping mow a field He Sprang for 10 cent cones You had your freckles I was just past orange Blond hair a melted heap Beneath a cap, grass Specked, stained by messy Errant sun screen applied Before she would let us go I remember the day at camp Arriving, big wiffle bat in hand (the kind that couldn't miss A pitched ball). Temptation sated As I flung it at his fat behind Maybe, he was frustrated Just embarking Maybe, I was acting out Before he rumbled, chased Down, assail like No toy could A tender backside I wasn't in pain as I cried Learning to hold in anxiety Especially the evening He pinned my neck In that dinner chair to floor Vicious words spat After I realized openly Why I had five extra newspapers Left over from my route I wouldn't finish my meal Reheated after He drove me to deliverance Of each tardy daily I suspected you were amused Each time I failed him But I was in his way until The day he lynched you At the back door After midnight with his Gripping hands Accusations of drug use Questions about your intent When she intervened (Slapped to the floor Like a dog) [With free mitt] before I arrived Locked burly arms behind thick torso, shoved Across our house to couch Sat upon him hammering his face Two stone fists Just glancing off That thick, dull skull Mouth drawn Like a wide-eyed fish Punished like a child As I shouted contempt Why couldn't I hurt him Hit him harder Turn him to dust? Because I still loved him. I went to bed knowing You and she were safe I still relive torture Restrain hard Not to hurt another But, I guess that depends Since I have my vocabulary You might not see me as a child of abuse. Nowhere to stand in your house With my drama. I'll wait outside No matter the weather Long for the proper invitation Somewhere the likes of me Is welcome Did I mention my baggage? |