What am I Doing Here?

I wish....

I expected to have a life in a city with a pleasant life. Some things are better than my old home town. Some things well let me know that there are things that I hope I can find a key to solve what concerns me.
I have been married for 2 1/2 years to a man who is not much older than I am. He lost his first wife about 4 years ago. Thirty seven years is not hard to get over or forget. But instinct tells me that he is not happy or completely well.
Old age is what we can all expect. There are certain diseases that slip in our bodies and minds unexpectedly. I have asked and the answer is that "I'm fine."
In the morning he is better than the late evening.
When he goes to bed early, he wakes up early. And ultimately wakes me up.
I would like both of us to get a check-up with no holds barred. I just want to see Stan happy and healthy.
If anyone reads this then I expect no comments. I might even delete this later. I just have to get this worry out and examine what it is.
For serious senior diseases, there are medicines to help.
I hope there will be something to help seniors who need to make their lives better.
I love you Stan. You are a good man.