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Printed from https://writing.com/main/books/entry_id/953725-Mere-Flesh
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Rated: 18+ · Book · Personal · #1196512
Not for the faint of art.
#953725 added March 5, 2019 at 12:25am
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Mere Flesh
http://nautil.us/issue/24/error/top-10-design-flaws-in-the-human-body

Top 10 Design Flaws in the Human Body

Evolution constructed our bodies with the biological equivalent of duct tape and lumber scraps.


Um... lumber scraps are biological. Duct tape I'm not sure about. Or duck tape.

With that in mind, I surveyed anatomists and biologists to compile a punch list for the human body, just as you’d do before buying a house. Get out your checkbook. This one’s a fixer-upper.

I'm too old to flip myself.

I'm not going to rehash the points of the article here. Some make sense. Some are idiotic. I'm just going to provide my own, unrelated top 10 list.

Waltz's Top 10 Design Flaws in the Human Body

10. Toes. Seriously, what the fuck?
9. Eyes on only one side of the head.
8. The inability to regenerate lost parts like some lizards do.
7. Lack of functional wings.
6. Sunburn.
5. Hair in odd places.
4. Ears. Have you looked at ears? REALLY looked at them? They're totally weird.
3. Absence of web shooters in wrists.
2. Farts.
1. Whatever the mechanism is that makes us gain weight after we're fully grown.

I mean, really, how can any list of human design flaws not include at least some of these?

© Copyright 2019 Robert Waltz (UN: cathartes02 at Writing.Com). All rights reserved.
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Printed from https://writing.com/main/books/entry_id/953725-Mere-Flesh