Can We Talk 2

SI Swimsuit

g          I haven't seen it. It's not something I particularly care to see each year. But the SI Swimsuit issue has been an annual event for quite a long time. Men of all ages consider it a "sport", and now women are getting becoming "followers". They have tried to remain relevant by using larger size models, by using body paint instead of fashion (I've pondered how two little scraps or strings of cloth can be considered fashion for years now). This year, I've read, they're even showing a wee bit of cellulite. You might celebrate that as real women, the kind in most abundance and available for live viewing. This year they're even boasting of an all female crew and staff for the photo shoot. All from a woman's point of view, I guess.

         However, I wonder if in this "me too" culture, does something like the SI Swimsuit issue have a place? Does it encourage the dehumanization of women and set them up as targets to be assaulted and exploited? Do these photos encourage men to see women's bodies as public property, rather than unique and personal and very private? Do they encourage women to entice or tease men in whom they are not interested?

         It seems like we're trying to have it both ways. We've got to figure this out and start taking more responsibility. Men always have exercised power over women, but we no longer consider it understandable or acceptable. But women have to be sure they aren't contributing to the problem. There's a lot of angles to examine.

         First, women raise and train men. It starts with what little boys get away with. Mothers have to train little boys, as well as girls, to be thoughtful of other people's rights and feelings. Next, girls and women need to know how to protect themselves. When a man, or a date, starts to get out of line, he needs to be told or pushed away. Granted, these days an old-fashioned slap in the face might bring equal or worse in return. But a woman can make it clear what is acceptable and what is not, especially in a work or business situation.

         But how does someone know what is acceptable the first time she encounters a troublesome situation? How does she learn to trust her own instincts? How do parents teach young women that if something doesn't feel right, they should back off without sounding hyper and prudish? And in our current culture, women are not encouraged to fight back or stand up for themselves. They are encouraged to be promiscuous and free. If a girl wants a boyfriend, she has to let him do whatever he wants. Is it different when she applies for a job, or auditions for a chorus line or a part in a play? Or if she works for a powerful politician? How does she handle difficult circumstances now, rather than come clean twenty years later?

         And why do some men believe that they are different from the mighty men who have fallen? When they see other illustrious careers crash so publicly, why do they believe that they can get away with the same behavior? Did they never learn that success and power do not insulate you from the consequences of your actions? Where were the masses of parents and educators and preachers for the last several generations?

         I watch a lot of old movies and old TV shows. I have become disgusted at quite a few for the way women are misrepresented and dehumanized so frequently. These legendary actors may be only playing a part, but the public sees them pushing women around, tearing their clothes, forcing them into relationships they don't want, or otherwise demeaning them. There are so many directors who seem incapable of portraying women as human beings with feelings and sensibilities and backbone. Many of those movies were box office hits and were critically acclaimed. nd what is a horror movie unless it has voluptuous naked women? Maybe it's time for "Hollywood" to examine the ways it portrays women more closely. What about better roles for women? If you're not a Katherine Hepburn or a Susan Sarandon, you have to simulate sex or take off your clothes to land a role.

         Television, which is in every home, could deliver more responsible programming. Even the comedy shows could emphasize more respect for other people, allowing people to stand up for themselves. Instead, they seem to want these child stars to grow up so fast and make sex so carefree and easy and unconnected to love and caring. These shows could be dealing with kids admitting to funny feelings about teachers or coaches before anything happens. They could deal with the adults dealing with their feelings before they do something they'll regret.

         Back to Sports Illustrated. What are they doing to encourage young athletes to stand up for themselves, to report inappropriate behavior of trainers and coaches without making false reports or damaging an innocent person's career? How can these swimsuits or the body image issues they seem to be dealing with help or improve the current toxic culture? I don't have the answers, only some questions. But we all need to give it some thought.