The Babes and the Wolf

Zombies, Dreams, and Writing As You Are

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30-Day Bloggers Group  (13+) Among the best bloggers on WDC can be found here. Join us, and expand your readership. #1788309 by Fivesixer

Prompt: Motivational Monday! Lloyd Bridges, born on this day in 1913, once said "I'm foremost an actor. I feel embarrassed being compared to the guys who really work at it. I fake it, I make believe I know all about it, which is what you're supposed to do as an actor." What are your thoughts on this, in relation to the things you write?

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HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  

I love reading the responses that people with decent to good self-esteem answer questions like this. Its always so uplifting,. I'm looking forward to it.

Also, is there really no way to embed a damn gif without a premium account!?! Even if its a url? HALP!

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But seriously...

You write as you are.

Not what you are. Not how you are.

Yes, all those things.

But more- and arching-over those things, you write as you are.

Because if you are fearful to write, you may write in muted, unassuming, even self-undermining tones - as if asking permission. Or you may write what is expected... What will get you attention... What you think will be pleasing to the ear. But regardless of how it's expressed, you will be writing for validation... For permission to speak... to breathe. If you are brave... If you are courageous... You may write with reckless abandon... with pensive caution or... With assertion and righteous authority... But you will always be seeking to write about that which is your truth. And so on.

If you google the term "Imposter Syndrome" you will get literally pages and pages of content (I've more than just a few). It is apparently that common. In fact, it is so common, that Fast Company   not too long ago published an article breaking imposter syndrome down into five types and delineated specific strategies to address each one of them.

But this is not about that specifically, so I'm not going to into it. You can read it if you're interested.

The point I'm coming around to here (I promise I'll get there soon) is that what you think of yourself or how you think others think of you not necessarily incredibly relevant to success.

Lloyd Bridges may not have thought of himself as the right kind of actor according to his self comparisons with other people. But he was honest with himself about that...

And he fucking did it anyway.

Even if he felt like he was faking it, he fucking did it anyway.

And for all he knows, every single one of those "other guys" the thinking the same damn thing, over compensating, or just really, really stuck up their own asses.

So... Fancy I should be saying this. (I've always been much better at giving good advice than taking it.) Especially since, not only am I a trained actor, but I gave up acting because I felt like I was shit at it, in spite of what other said (haters not included - because if there's anything I've learned in the years since, there will always be at least one hater, even if it isn't malicious hating. You just can't please everyone. If you've not a single hater, you're either inconsequential, bland, or oblivious).

I didn't give up writing for the time that I stopped writing. Not really. It wasn't a choice. I was going through a lot of shit, most of which I couldn't even find the words to describe and that silence turned to writer's block... Which turned to a vicious cycle of self-deprecation and silence. But I am struggling with this very feeling of inadequacy, like I've lost something irretrievable, in the process of trying to rebuild the only thing I've really ever felt like I was good for.

So, when I write, I have to remind myself of that. Every time I write: how much it took just to muster up the self-compassion and will to allow myself to return to a beginner's mind on this... Reminding myself of the fact that, if you're not willing to write a bunch of utter shyte, you will never finish up with anything good.

Yes, confidence is a big deal. It dictates a lot but it doesn't come before the doing. It might never come (although, you know, therapy helps too). But success if in the doing, not necessarily how you happen to label yourself at the moment. The only way you can really fake to is if you're trying to do it like someone else.

One more thing is that, I love how Bridges started off this comment with:

First and foremost, I'm an actor

He didn't say, I try to be an actor. He said "I am an actor".

Case closed.

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FORUM

Soundtracks of Our Lives  (E) Sharing the music that makes us original... #2144947 by Lyn's a Witchy Woman

This one's for you, Dolores O'Riordan  

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My pick for today's Soundtrack is Zombie by The Cranberries , who's lead singer was reported dead today. Zombie is another song that figured in my early social consciousness. Below is another song close to my heart, Dreams.

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