A Tribute to Life in Washington D.C.

Fun Times in Ferguson

Ferguson MO - Today, I continue my road adventures selling the health plan to my federal compadres. I am presently staged in a mid-western war zone between Ferguson and Cool Valley, MO. My Uber driver picked me up and after learning of my requested destination, he was compelled to comment on my whiteness and the degree to which I will be out of place when I arrive at my destination. “Do you know where you’re going?” he asked unapologetically.

“Sure”, I said. “I’m headed to the Department of Agriculture in the Goodfellow Complex. It’s a secure federal property. How bad can it be?” I asked.

“Yeah, that’s where you’re going, but do you know where that puts you?” he smirked. He assured me that I would probably be safe behind the gates of the complex, but was taking my life into my own hands should I chose to walk the surrounding streets. “I don’t even except jobs when I’m in this area. No fare is worth my life. I turn the Uber app off in this part of town,” cautioned my driver.

Later that evening after successfully retreating to the safety of my airport hotel, I received a call from the assistant manager of our local office. Nancy advised me that she may be late to work tomorrow because she had to pick-up the office manager, Steve, from the police station because the cops took possession of his car, cell phone, and gun. “What…Why?” I asked.

“Steve busted a cap in a mother fucker trying to steal his car, said Nancy. “They were pistol-whipping his ass trying to jack his car. He got to his gun and pop…pop. Mother fucker died at the hospital.”

It seems that the police readily believed Steve's claim of self-defense and let him go within hours of declaring the perp dead. How does one bounce-back from that type of morning? Hi honey, I’m home… Did anything interesting happen today at work? Yeah, I shot a would-be carjacker. It took a couple hours to explain the incident to the cops, but they eventually got it. Once he died, there was no one to dispute what happened. How was your day?