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Printed from https://writing.com/main/books/entry_id/895679-Being-a-Good-Janitor
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Rated: 13+ · Book · Comedy · #2087000
What good is freewill ?
#895679 added October 27, 2016 at 8:46pm
Restrictions: None
Being a Good Janitor.
Muzzy is given a memo on his job description.
He is a janitor at the SNL studio, at
30 Rockefeller Plaza.

"Ehm. There are 140 check points."
Muzzy remarks.

"Yeah. Do you want to do this?"
Norm Micheals looks jaundice.

"Okay.. This girl, the one who plays
Hillary Clinton, she doesn't want any
eye contact with the staff?"
Muzzy rubs the back of his head.

"She's a paranoid schizophrenic and
she bites. Just clean and don't look
at her." Norm takes some pills.

"You have a jumpy room?" Muzzy flips
through his memo.

"That's a safe space. Just hose it
down and replace the balloons."
Norm has a twitch in his right eye.

"Oh? That big black girl as a punching
bag and she likes to throw knives into
an manikin?" Muzzy makes some notes.

"It's her creative process..
and don't make eye contact with her
either." Mr. Micheals stretches back in
his leather office chair.

"Avoid speaking around the cast.
They will attack you if they sense fear.
I would also like you to shine my shoes."
Norm points to his personal shoe shine chair.

"Was the original cast this weird?"
Muzzy sips his beat juice.

"I'm very disappointed in that remark.
Comedians should challenge the norms of the status quo.
Your orientation package should have mentioned
that NBC staff are not to voice their opinions.
We have a very good Obama insurance package
that will take 75% of your salary.
I suggest you get a second job, maybe in
fast food.
Are you on the team?" Micheals leans forward.

"Yeah. My last job was fast food.
They were total nut jobs."
Muzzy signs the contract in blood and swears
an oath of silence to the Illuminati.


NBC
<^>
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