December Advent Challenges

Away With The Fairies - The Ballad of Tommy "Shots" Rotten

This rewrite of "Away in a Manger" was written for "Invalid Item"  as part of December Advent Challenges.

"Away With The Fairies"
(The Ballad of Tommy "Shots" Rotten)

He woke in a stable,
Rough straw on his bed,
There Tommy "Shots" Rotten
Cried "Ouch! My poor head!"

The stars in the bright sky
Were all blinking out,
When Tommy'd collapsed
Like a dumb drunken lout.

He woke hours later
To the sound of some cattle,
Surprised he'd appeared
On a milk farm in Battle*

Then Tommy said "Jesus!
How much did I drink?!"
With the increasing moos,
He was struggling to think.

He knew there'd been vodka
And most surely gin -
He vaguely remembered
Throwing up in a bin.

Bless all the poor drunkards
Who may likely find
Themselves like our Tommy
In a similar bind!

24 lines

(Note: "Battle" is a small town located in the South of England, near Hastings)