Hey, life? Are you kidding me?

Green Acres is the Place to be. . .

Remember Green Acres? For you younguns it's worth a YouTube search to at least listen to the theme song.

As I have mentioned, I got married in June... to a farmer. (Yes, that can be and is a full-time job with no pay for overtime and the "smaller" holidays, such as Labor Day are ironically still work days. Now, I wasn't any city slicker before this - despite the rumors. I actually grew up on 160 acres; though I spent the vast majority of it inside trying to avoid chores or pulling of animals out of other animals or weird bugs, physical labor, and I might have even longed for just one Icee stand to be within 15 miles of the house - but I was NOT a city slicker.

I was good at this evasive behavior too. The first and possibly only 'real' farm work I had to attempt was my Senior year in high school. Before that my brother or sister were called upon to do such things - dang them for going to college. I won't go into to detail but this calf was halfway out of the mama cow, breach (not good) and it wasn't going to live or maybe never had; but anyway Dad needed help coaxing said cow somewhere for something. All I really remember (after being hypnotized several times in an effort to forget this event) was it is the closest I ever came to raising my voice to my dad, my dad raised his voice many times to me during the 'task' with more idioms and colorful language than was needed, AND I was having a good hair day. Work with me here, be 18 again and finally having a hair day that you know looks good; that you can flip, shake your head, and it doesn't go flat or frizz or have one weird stubborn strand of hair. Now add perspiration and dirt to it - not even the most amazing hair can live up to that.

That was just an anecdote to provide back story to my farm life. I went to an education conference today so I saw several teachers that I'd not seen since I married. Immediately, the thought of me on a farm brought humor to the conference.

"So, Audra what have you done on the ole homestead this summer?" chuckle chuckle.

For those doubters of my ability to adapt, here you go:

1. I've opened gates (It's hot in Oklahoma) - Every day. . . and I almost don't dread it now.

2. I've heated water without complaint to bath and do dishes when the hot water heater wasn't working.

3. I have killed a wasp (inside the house. . . more than once).

4. I have seen dead animals - mice, poor baby kitty, centipede

5. I held a new baby kitty (not the one mentioned above) all day trying to keep it alive because it had been in the rain during the night. My efforts didn't work, but I tried.

6. I picked up tree limbs,a bazillion I think, so the 'lawn' could be mowed. How do you know on a farm where the lawn ends and the wilderness begins?

7. I have gained the ability to not verbalize the words: "You want me to do what?" when my sweet husband asks me to do something that is common place to him.

8. Okay this is a biggie - deep breath - I have checked my husband's back for ticks when he has come in and even once pulled one off. But we don't call them ticks because that still freaks me out so I just requested that we please refer to them as "fuzz". It doesn't make sense but it sounds so much more pleasant.

I'm sure I will do so much more - and guess what? I'm kind of looking forward to it. (not the fuzz part though). So I may still be a little green but this is the place for me to be.

It's the berries,

Audra/size}