Hope Burning

Chapter Thirteen:

         They spent the rest of the afternoon at the fair which turned out to be just as fun as Mark had promised it would be. All through the day Mark made sure to touch her often in many small ways; not wanting her to have a chance to distance herself form him and the knowledge of how their relationship had changed since last night. Jessica surprised him by not pulling away though she stiffened and seemed slightly uncomfortable with each physical contact. There were times however that she seemed to relax and forget to be nervous and seemed to really enjoy herself and being with him. Afterward they went back to the inn for dinner.

         As soon as they walked into the lobby Jessica caught sight of Stacy who was already moving toward her.

         “Mark, I forgot to tell you why I came banging on your door last night.” Seeing where Jessica was looking he turned to look at the attractive young woman approaching them smiling widely.

         “Jessica! I was worried I wouldn’t see you today. You must be Mr. Taylor staying in the cottage. I am Stacy, My grandparents own the inn. They are quite fond of you Mr. Taylor.” She said as she turned to greet Mark. Her eyes showed her appreciation for the handsome man her granparents had told her about.

         “Please call me Mark. I have heard much about you from John and Judy. Congratulations on your acceptance to Dartmouth! I hear you got a full scholarship. They are so proud they can’t stop bragging.”

         Stacy smiled up at Mark. "Thank you. I know they are so embarassing!" Laughing she took Jessica’s hand in hers and pulled her slightly to the side for the illusion of privacy.

         “Thank you, Jessica. I was so upset last night I didn’t know what to do. I know you are only here for the weekend but I was hoping we could talk before you leave.” The sincerity and hope in the young anxious face softened her heart even more toward the troubled young woman.

         “Of course.” Jessica glanced back to Mark leaning casually on the banister trying to look like he couldn’t hear what was going on just a few feet away. “Mark?”

         Mark insisted she join them for dinner, after which he made himself scarce heading back to the cottage to allow them time to chat privately. He didn’t press either woman for details during dinner knowing he would hear about what happened the night before when Jessica came back to the cottage. Dinner turned out to be a pleasant affair with comfortable casual conversation.

         Jessica and Stacy talked for hours in a quiet corner of the dining room. The two women felt at ease in each others company and Jessica felt herself sharing the ordeals of the last year with this stranger she had known for less than 24 hours. She hadn’t shared anything about what happened with anyone since the accident. She had not even talked to Mark about it yet. Why did she feel like she could talk to this young woman when she wasn’t able to talk to her friends and family or even the psychologist who was supposed to helps her. But here she was sharing every detail she could remember and even admitting how much she didn’t remember. Though there was almost a decades difference in their ages it didn’t seem to matter. Jessica wondered if what had happened with Mark last night had brought her out of her self imposed cocoon. Blushing at the thought she tried to focus her attention back onto what Stacy was talking about. After spending the last nine months of her life unable to deal with her own problems and completely unable and unwilling to add anyone else’s issues on top of that she was surprised to find herself interested and involved in this young woman’s troubles. 

         After exchanging contact information with Stacy she headed out the back door and wandered slowly in the direction of Marks rental cottage. When she finally arrived at the cottage she was so absorbed in her musings that she simply sat on the patio to give herself more time to think about everything that had happened and how it was affecting her.

         After what had happened last night with Mark and then the talk she had with Stacy she felt lighter and more confident and comfortable than she had since the accident nine months before. She had been sure she would never feel normal again. She had tried to accept that the dreams she had held for her life were gone and with all the emotions that had been stirred up since meeting Mark she was trying to regain her balance.

         He found her there hours later. He had begun to worry when she didn’t show up long after the women would surely call it a night and head to bed. He almost tripped over her on the porch.

         “Jess! What are you doing out here?” He stumbled catching himself on the support post. “I was worried about you. How long have you been out here honey?”

         “I was just thinking. I… just needed to be alone for a while you didn’t have to stay up for me.”

         “Come on, lets go in.” He held the door open and ushered her inside. When she was settled on the couch he handed her a glass of red wine and held up his own glass. “I thought we could chat tonight too but it’s pretty late and I am sure you are tired so how about one glass of wine and then we can both get some rest.”

         “Mark, we need to talk.”

         “I know. First there is something I want to give you.” He pulled a cardboard package from behind the arm chair and came to sit next to her on the couch and placed it in her lap.

         “Mark! No..I..”

         “Oh calm down. It is just something I feel I owe you. Just open it then you can decide what you think about it.”

         Looking doubtfully at the package in her lap she reluctantly opened the box and pulled out the cushion wrapped item inside. With the first glimpse of smooth pale green glass she knew what it was. Her breathe caught in her throat and she looked wide eyed at this surprising man sitting before her looking for all the world like a little boy on Christmas morning. He practically bounced with excitement and tension waiting to hear if she was pleased.

         “Mark, how? How did you do this?” she wasn’t sure he even heard her whispery voice. She caressed the smooth contours of the jade green pie dish that she held in her lap. She couldn’t tell the difference from the original. “I didn’t think another one like it existed!”

         “I had a friend of my mothers look for it, she’s an antique dealer and it was more difficult to find than I expected and this is the only one she could find. Apparently there weren’t many like that made in the first place.”

         Tears slid down her cheeks as she rubbed the edge of the dish where she almost expected to discover the same small chip missing that was on the old one. She smiled as she remembered the story of how the chip had come to be.

         On her mothers wedding day she had been given the pie dish and that very same day she accidentally tripped and nicked the edge knocking off a small almost unnoticeable chip that of course was noticed by every single person in the family. She still hadn’t lived that particular embarrassment down.

         Marks voice intruded on her memory and she turned to face him. “Jess, please don’t cry. I knew it was important to you and I felt so bad that the other one broke.”

         “Mark. It’s wonderful. Thank you.” Impulsively she planted a kiss on his lips not thinking about or planning on the instant fire that surged through each of them.

         As soon as her lips met his she froze unable to move closer or pull away. He reached up and held her face in his hands as he kissed her more fervently.

         Finally pulling away she looked up into Marks face. Neither said anything as she lifted the pie dish and put it on the table. She stood and walked into the bedroom not looking behind to see what Mark was doing. He waited to follow giving Jessica plenty of time. By the time he had joined her in the bedroom she had changed into another tank top and shorts but had her light robe wrapped around her and was sitting in bed with the sheets pulled up to her waist looking away from the door.

         “I’m not…ready for much yet, but…” she twisted her hands in her lap nervously. Mark stood silently in the door way just listening and waiting not wanting to push her.

         “It’s really silly for either of us to have to sleep on that uncomfortable sofa bed. Besides, it’s not like we haven’t already slept together.” she looked up at him then with a wry smile on her lips.

         “Well, ok but no trying to seduce me this time. I do have my virtue to think about.” he sniffed and tried to look serious as he climbed into bed.

         Her soft laugh was shy and somewhat forced. She watched him from the corner of her eye as he slid into bed and stretched out beneath the covers looking so sexy that she almost lost her nerve completely.

         Mark lay on his side propping his head up with his hand smiling gently at her.

         “Come here. I won’t bite and you can’t sleep sitting up like that” She did not resist his arms pulling her down into the bed and into his arms. He settled her into his side pressing her head into his shoulder in a warm embrace. "And this is silly." He said plucking at her robe. "I know it's not comfortable." His hands began peeling it away and when she reached to pull it back on he stopped her. "Jess. I have seen it all and you know I think your beautiful. Don't be afraid. Not of me." Jessica let her hands fall and allowed Mark to remove the robe. Once it was gone she curled once again into his arm and tried not to think about her exposed scars.

         “Don’t worry Jess I wont let you take advantage of me.” his fingers slid into her hair enjoying the soft fluffy feel of the thick tresses.

         “Mark. I need to tell you… what happened to me last year.” she stopped suddenly and pressed her face into his shoulder again hiding her face in his long silky black hair.

         “You can tell me anything you want whenever you feel ready but I am not going to force you. You don’t have to tell me anything tonight.”

         “I know. I need to tell you. I need you to know what happened.” She knew she meant it as soon as she spoke. She had thought it would be difficult to open up to this man who she had known for such a short time but instead she felt completely safe and right telling him. Maybe all she had needed was someone like Stacy to open up to first. Whatever the reason she wanted to tell Mark now.

         As she spoke, telling him everything she remembered of what had happened last year and everything that had happened afterward, she relaxed into his embrace finding comfort and safety there.

         While she spoke Mark didn’t dare say a word or interrupt. As she poured out her tale he felt more and more for the woman laying in his arms and became more determined than ever to never lose her. I love her! He realized with a shock not knowing why it should surprise him nor why he didn’t see it before now.

         When she was finally finished he asked more about what happened after she had left Peters house, the period of time she claimed she had no memory of but he suspected that she had pieces of the puzzle locked away in her mind.

         “Honestly Mark I don’t remember anything concrete. I have tried but nothing ever comes.”

         “Jess what are your nightmares about? Are they about that night?”

         “Yes” Her voice was barely a whisper. His insight was disconcerting and she didn’t like thinking about her dreams. She did not want to remember them and shook her head.

         “Can you remember anything from your dreams?”

         “No. Mark. I can’t.” Shuddering she buried her face farther in his hair.

         “Shhh. Sleep now. You’re tired we can talk later. Don‘t worry I’ll wake you if you have anymore bad dreams.”

         Mark lay awake holding Jessica for long time after she finally fell asleep. He thought about what had happened to her and what little she had been able to tell him about that night. Something about it kept bothering him but he couldn’t put his finger on it. He kept going over it in his mind as he lay there.

         She went to Peters house and broke up with him. He had been furious. She left and when she got home she was apparently badly beaten and the house set ablaze, presumably to cover the evidence. During the fire she had been badly burned before the firemen had pulled her out. The last thing she says she remembers is pulling away from Peters home. She doesn’t remember driving home or arriving or anything of the assault or fire. The police assumed she interrupted a burglary and was beaten and left for dead before setting the fire. There had been a rash of burglaries in the neighborhood in the months previous but when the burglars were discovered months after the fire they were just local teens out for thrills and swear they had nothing to do with the assault and fire at Jessica’s apartment. The police still weren’t sure who had assaulted Jessica and set her place on fire and the teens arrested for the other local burglaries did not fit what they thought they were looking for in Jessica’s case.

         It just seemed like an incredible coincidence that the same day she broke up with Peter, whose temper Mark had already witnessed, that she was so viciously beaten and left for dead.

         Mark decided he would look into the matter and try and get more information from Jessica. He was sure her dreams were about that night and he knew it wasn’t all about the fire. He remembered all too well her fear and how hard she had fought him while caught in the dream. Mark thought she had to be dreaming of being attacked. Some part of her remembered that night and was trying to get through.

         With his decision made, Mark finally found sleep himself.Jessica woke once during the night from a bad dream but it wasn’t near the intensity of the previous night. She was quickly calmed and back to sleep in Marks arms.
         
         The next day they explored the rest of the fair and shared it with Stacy whom they had invited at dinner the night before. Mark found that the young woman was bright and fun and she and Jessica seemed to be fast friends. Although Mark thought the young woman had something that was weighing heavily on her mind. Her eyes had a sadness there that though she tried she couldn't hide.

         Very aware of how unusual it was for the Jessica he had come to know to be so comfortable and close with someone, he hoped it boded well for his own relationship with her. Maybe she is beginning to heal, he thought as they said their goodbyes to Stacy and her Grandparents.

         John and Judy the innkeepers and Stacy’s grandparents had insisted on reimbursing Jessica for the inconvenience of losing her room as well as her kindness to their granddaughter and offered her a free weekend in the cottage anytime she wanted to come back. Mark noticed the usually lighthearted and jovial couple seemed concerned about something and it seemed to be centered around Stacy. Still not knowing what was going on with the sweet young woman he hoped her troubles would soon be resolved, for he liked the girl.