Everyday Canvas

The Vanity of “I am Proud of You!”

Prompt: When was the last time someone told you that they were proud of you?

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Yesterday, but at this point, I don’t want to elaborate on it. Instead, I’ll talk about being proud of someone and telling them that point blank, face to face. Like a gunshot.

Like a gunshot, because sometimes, this is not a good idea, since the person may not like to be openly praised by someone else who thinks he or she is a god. Some people do what they have to do as this is part of their normal life or vocation or interests, and think nothing of it. They may even be embarrassed or feel belittled.

When people say they are proud of you, they are putting you on the spot. Plus they are acting as if they are your parents or superiors. Saying, “I am proud of you,” shows the other person’s vanity, for he or she is putting herself into her praise. Saying, “Thank you for the work you did,” is always the better approach.

On the other hand, I think saying, “I am proud of being in the same group with you or working with you,” is perfectly appropriate.

I wouldn’t mind a parent or a teacher or my superior (if in a work situation) telling me they are proud of me, but coming from anyone else, it feels as if I am being paid an underhanded compliment.

We can all be proud to be something or other, but to be proud of a person is taking it too far. We can always be proud of ourselves, when and if we deserve it, and thankful for other people’s efforts, but I think, telling them we are proud of them is a condescending attitude.