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It was the worst of times Now it's the BEST!

i can't  help but be be literal and i know how annoying that can be, i'm sorry but i've gotten in trouble too often by answering questions that weren't really asked so i risk being annoying rather than risk being stoned and i've gotten in trouble before when people thought i was stoned too when i really wasn't - when i wake up at night and ask the question, is life....., i hear myself asking a question, i hear myself asking, is life meaningful, or anything else for that matter, no really that's what i used to ask, before i realized that, no it isn't meaningful, not purposeful, not anything but what it is, for 60 years i tried to answer the question, is life something other than what it really is, never happy because i spent all my time trying to figure out what life is, kept listening to other people when they tried to tell me what life is, kept getting different answers from different people and often different answers from the same person, hell yeah, the purpose of life,  i finally decided that no body knew what they were talking about and that i'd have to decide what the purpose of life is, and i still wasn't happy, i went through all the purposes i could think of and there were all kinds of internal contradictions and i couldn't find any that made any sense till i stopped looking for a purpose and just answered the question, is life......., of course it is, it'd be pretty stupid to say it isn't, it is and always has been exactly what it is, just look around, there doesn't need to be any purpose or reason, cuz a purpose or a reason isn't gonna change the fact that life is always gonna be exactly what it is, and the only way you are going to know what it is is by looking at it, asking questions isn't going to get you anywhere - It was the worst of times when I tried to answer all the questions.  It has been the best of times since I started just accepting the answers that have always been right in front of me.