You never know what you'll find - humor, ramblings, rants, randomness- it's all me! |
What Would Life be Like if Our Past & Future Were Joined. .. Now, I know some of you are going to say they are because of what happens in the past becomes a part of who we are. And while that was my initial response too, I think my mind may be changing or I'm meaning something different by the notion of past meeting future. Maybe I've stumbled on my idea of utopia. What would I want to bring from my past into the future? This is off the cuff so it may be a little rough ~ ha, a rhyme! No charge, it's a freebie. 1. My fitness and energy 2. My naivety - that may seem a strange one to miss, but I do. I miss not knowing that bad things happen to all people. And pain, whether physical, emotional, or spiritual - can change you forever and make you wish for things that perhaps you shouldn't. I miss only seeing rainbows, not being touched by the storm. 3. My faith that I could and would impact the world around me in incredible ways. That dreaming and sheer determination were all it took. 4. - I have to come up with a fourth - This is another one that may seem odd. I miss the selfishness - that's not the right word, but hey, it's Friday - my brain is tired. I guess it's basically putting myself first or at least in the top four. Focusing on what I need and want. Obviously, I can't make a list of what I have in the future that would collide with past me since . . . well, it's in the future; and one thing I've learned: The future is never certain. Therefore, I will list four from the present ~ of course, four; when did this passion for a number even begin?~ 1. The realization and knowing first hand that you can love others much more deeply than you love yourself. That when you allow that love to develop and embrace it, your life is enriched more than you could ever have alone. 2. Mistakes and failure aren't the same thing - and neither define you as a person. They are results of actions, not characteristics. And, no matter how long you hide under your covers in the fetal position denying it, you will in fact learn something from them. 3. You don't get to travel back in time - life isn't a dress rehearsal, as they say - but sometimes you get do-overs. Accept them for what they are - a gift for the future. Looking back is fine as a pastime, but looking forward paves the road for the impossible. 4. I wish I had the strength I have now and the ability to take care of myself and others. Though this isn't necessarily the factor in my life that I am 'proudest' of, it is something I lacked in my past. Something I didn't even want. I was quite content being taken care of. That's the baby of the family for you ~ all those psychological studies can't be totally incorrect. I'm not sure where I'm even going with this. Maybe I'm having a mini mid-life crisis and I'm too poor to have plastic surgery or buy my dream car. I just look back and wonder where that girl went. . . and I look forward with anticipation of the life I have yet to experience. I have so much to be thankful for in my past and present - overall, life has been kind to me. Even at forty-five-years old, the future feels promising. Promising of new adventures, changes, adaptation, decisions, occurrences that will quickly turn into treasured memories. I don't want to change the past; I just want to channel a little bit to the future. Final Realization: I think these steroids the doc put me on for an ear problem may be affecting a little more than my ear. Off to google 'side effects of 6 steroid pills in a day, Audra love
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